The offseason has been kind of a clunker so far. No oomph, no passion, no blockbuster deals — not much more than recycling some warm bodies. And coping with Super Bowl Loser syndrome.
The Draft is two weeks off. Maybe that will juice things up. The team wasn’t good enough last year and, on paper, it’s less good now. So juice is definitely called for.
Juicing things up was way much more easier thirty years ago, when youth was still on my side. There was drugs, enormous quantities of booze, criminal activity, lecherous shenanigans, and most of all the illusion of self-importance, the grandness of one’s own being.
I was on the back deck this morning, staring up into the dark, clear sky at the huge constellation Scorpius, just above the southern horizon. Somehow I got to wondering what particular guy in history was the first to nudge his fellow man and say, “Hey, Hairball, those stars look like a scorpion!”
Whoever it was, he died without proper historical credit. It was probably sometime in antiquity around when the ancient astronauts popped down to earth for some R&R and got the idea that injecting a cognitive virus into a couple of monkeys would screw this wonderful planet up in a hurry. Cosmic pranksters.
Now, many years later, we’re sitting here fondling the valium bottle over the idea of Craig Dahl becoming the starting FS for the team next year. In fairness to Dahl, he might not be the worst safety in the league, but it’s close. And while the 49ers are signing the White Dahlia, the Seahawks are signing guys like Percy Harvin, one of the most dangerous offensive talents in the league. And a guy the 49ers have never been able to defend against.
I don’t want to put too much pressure on Trent Baalke, but he better get this draft right. The 49er offense seems good to go for many years, but the defense needs some fresh meat. Prime meat.
Vic Fangio could be on the hot seat this year, too. His track record as a DC is not very reassuring. His defenses have started good and gotten worse every place he’s been. They got worse in a hurry during last year’s playoffs. Maybe it was the injuries, and maybe not.
Right now, it feels like 2013 will be a re-group year. After 18 long years, we finally made it back to the SB last year, then we blew the damn game. It’s going to take awhile to shake off that failure.