The Crabtree Riddle

The long awaited debut of the 2011 49er offseason practices begins today. I can’t believe I just wrote that sentence. Practices? We’re all so starved for actuality that practices are “long awaited,” much less mentioned at all?

This is where it gets difficult to explain to a non-football fan the merits of having the football disease. The Bachelor looks like spine tingling drama compared to this yawn inducing event.

Today’s imitation mini-camp does have one bit of tension filled relationship problem angst, which could eventually become a full blown crisis, so there is some inducement to stay awake. Namely, will the 49er star wide receiver, Michael Crabtree, even bother to show up? Beyond that, will he be enthusiastic or sullen if he does show up?

Some have suggested Crabtree doesn’t really want to be in SF and that he doesn’t care for the quarterback, and these opinions may be true. It’s also possible he doesn’t like living in the shadow of Vernon Davis as the marquee offensive talent on the team. Second fiddle is not an instrument Crabtree ever had to play as he was ascending to the heights of adulation in the sub-pro football world. In addition, it was VD who confronted Crabtree last year, essentially chumping him in front of his teammates. It’s no stretch to think an immature borderline diva has some serious sulk in his system over these issues and events. Nothing a 1,000 yard season wouldn’t cure pretty instantaneously, but the public is growing skeptical that these achievements are in his heart or his skill set.

Other than this curiosity piece, there is not much to offer the viewing public here. The offense will be practicing by itself and the defense by itself. Each group will be mostly focusing on learning the terminology and basics of yet another offensive system, and the first new defensive system since 2006.

The offensive workouts will be conducted by Coach UQB, who recently signed a multi-year coach emeritus contract with the 49ers, guaranteeing he will be in and around the franchise for the remainder of his life. Haha. Just kidding, folks. Put down those weapons.

I would assume Barrows, Maiocco, et al will cover these practices and give us a head count as to who is there and who isn’t. It would be nice to see David Baas in attendance. Like UQB, Baas is a FA and an appearance now might provide a hint that he also intended to re-sign with the Niners. Failing that, the team would be entering the eventual FA period with gaping holes in the middle of both trench lines. Not a good thing.

The rain that has been mysteriously dripping relentlessly down upon the Bay Area the past few weeks is scheduled to be replaced by sunny days this week, perhaps indicating that the football gods are stepping up to the plate and symbolically pushing away the gloom of this past offseason. At least it’s pleasant to think so. Even if it’s just a crock of baloney.

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44 comments on “The Crabtree Riddle
  1. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    I see you are going pecksniffian on Crabtree. I am too for now. If he blows off these practices I will have a new and negative attitude until he produces some consistent eye popping game performances.

  2. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    I often wonder if Crabtree still has the same assbite agent Eugene Parker. After Crabtree came in from his holdout Parker never made a public comment and just faded away.
    If Parker is still his agent he could be polluting Crabtree’s mind
    advsing him that the Niners screwed him in his contract so why do the “extra” stuff?
    If this is true I would find a new agent.
    I’m hopeful Crabtree shows up and works hard.

  3. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    bullit- My guess is he will be there today. I hope so.

  4. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    Skeebs, exactly. It’s come to this: “Coach” UQB conducts spring practice for the offense and we all wonder if the big baby WR, aka UWR, will get off his lazy pampered ass and join his team. Wow, that’s thin stuff but whatya gonna do?
    Bergs I’m preempting your possible negative attitude and calling bullshit on the pecksniffian attitude of d’UWR and his lame ass agent, what’s his name. Higher moral principles? Crap. Tree. Moron.
    bullit, ah yes eugene parker. There’s a pleasant memory. I would seriously love it if the fans would get a clue and BOO dipshit UWR and show a glimmer of football IQ as to who gives a royal crap about the 49ers and who needs to change his own diapers?

    Actually the UWR seriously overestimates the tolerance of fans for pure crap after 10 stinking years of what we have put up with. Trade the UWR before the rest of the league catches on!

  5. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    damn for got the;;;;

  6. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    This works, too, and is much easier:
    . <----- period on empty line . See!

  7. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    Hi Skeebs. Thanks I mastered the ‘period’ technique, lol, but wanted to see if I was ready to graduate to the &nsbp; Actually, not yet, damn

  8. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    BTW I want to give a shout out to unca_chuck and tell him that, politics aside (as it should be here) I hope that he will come back and join in our football musings…My favorite brother is a Democrat and my son is a Pats fan but I have long ago forgiven them for those sins, haha. So unca, hey man, I remember you as one hell of a writer back in the day and I hope you will come back here and join in sometime.
    Cheers people. phil

  9. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Phil- Your difficulty with handling the nabisco if very entertaining!

  10. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Speaking of New England and Patriots how about that Sarah Palin?
    She gave us all the inside scoop on Paul Revere’s ride. She did a Paul Harvey and let us know “the rest of the story”.
    Should this person have control of our nuclear arsenal?

  11. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    Should A*** S**** have control of our offensive arsenal? I know which one I’d rather have in control…”I can see Russia from my house.” I can see Alex throwing an INT at the Bolshoi. I can see A*** fumbling at St. Basil’s. I can see A*** burning a TO at the Red Square. I can see…

  12. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    Crabtree just showed up with Josh Morgan. Baby steps.

  13. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    bullit- It would be much better than having Obama watching them. You know, the guy that hasn’t visited all 57 states yet.

  14. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    A*** S**** is closing the practices to the media? WTF does he think he is, Tom Brady? Hahahahahahahahahaha.

  15. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    Dennis, Alex is afraid the media will see our New Special Super Secret Plutonium-Grade Offensive Firepower.

    j/k, obviously. 🙁

  16. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    So we once again have Crabs AND VD!

    Yay, go team! 🙂

  17. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    I can really get into the political debate but this is not the place for it.
    I’ll stick to talking 49ers and football here.
    I just don’t want losing discussions to turn to political debates. That seems to be a favorite tactic of a few here.

  18. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    We have enough depressing, futile, irresolvable arguments here just with Alex Smith. Why the hell add to them with politics? 😉

  19. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Practice is at San Jose State
    and is closed to public.

    Coach Smith indiactes the Thurs
    practice might be open to the media only.

    Wasn’t this supposed to be a 3 day minicamp?

  20. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    Bullit, does us all a favor a please refrain from calling him “Coach S****.” That’s a huge disservice and a huge insult to people like Bill Walsh.

  21. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    NF Wow aren’t we sensitive.
    Look at you regularly calling people talking donkeys and then saying who me?
    Get off your high horse and stop your intimidation bullshit.

    If my sister were a crackwhore she would tell me you couldn’t get it up and you are tiny and you wear hot neon pink underwear and cross dress Liberace style.

  22. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    Heh heh. Right, NoFear. Like saying “No disrespect intended . . .”
    As in, “Yer muthuh’s a whore, and yer a brain-dead mook. No disrespect intended.”
    Thx, Phil. Nothing much to talk about these days. Crabs is in pseudo-camp? Whoopie! I guess it’s fine. I mean, this is glorified flag football without the flags. There’s no contact. Just drills. Better than these guys NOT doing anything, but hey, Alex is doing about the only thing he can, and that’s to act interested and pretend that he’s taking charge. Is he? Will it matter in the end? Will they even play?
    All this and more . . . as the stomache turns . . .

  23. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Person In Charge Smith will open tomorrows practice for 30 mins to the media per tweet from Mindi Bach.

  24. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    My new name for Alex is “Dude Isn’t Colin Kaepernick, ” or DICK for short . . .

  25. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    I thought it was UQB?

  26. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Unca- LOL!

  27. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    This looks like the place to be, since my blog is going through its final spasmotic convulsing death-throes . . .

  28. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    No he doesn’t, NoFear.
    Why, I never . . .
    I’m sure there’s point there somewhere, skippy. But as usual, you post with your lightning-fast turtle instincts and quickly hide your head when anything requiring you to provide the resolution to a problem rears its thorny head.
    I will give you this. Your V-like tenacity in holding on to your midguided hatreds regarding the team are to be admired.
    Hyuk. Lighten up, skippy . . .

  29. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    NoFear, it’s very easy to point to the past decisions and say here, here, and here are where they went wrong. This is one of V’s greatest talents. He can tell you Sean Payton is a great coach the year after he wins a super bowl.
    Yeah, I was wrong about Singletary. I thought he’d adjust the dogshit offense he created with Raye in 2009 and craft at least a decent 2010 season by opening things up. Didn’t work out that way. Alex Smith? Who knows? Like I said, there seems to be a maelstrom of epic proportions that appears to be sucking him back to the 49ers at every turn like some malevolent black hole.
    I was wrong about Nolan as well. So? After the 2006 season, I though there WAS reason to be optimistic. Well, shit went haywire, and Teflon Mike was shown the road.
    What’s next? We all get to see. Me? I figured I’d go with a 3-13 prediction, if there IS a fricking season. Thinking they’ll at least be serviceable has gotten me nowhere.

  30. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    One needs not have to read in between the lines vis-a-vis Crabtree’s thoughts towards A*** S**** to know how he feels — he hates the son of a bitch! He wouldn’t even go as far today as to name the UQB (maybe he’s been this blog) when asked about getting his timing down with the starting quarterback: “Who’s the quarterback?” Crabtree has absolutely no faith in A*** S**** and hopes like hell that anyone other than #11 will be throwing him passes this year. Sounds like another excuse just waiting to happen…”Crabtree wouldn’t work with A***. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

  31. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    (maybe he’s been “reading” this blog) I’m back to leaving out entire words in my posts again. I really need to talk to my pharmacist. You might know him better as the night Mgr. at BevMo.

  32. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    Hey chuck. Welcome back to the pie fight. This could very well be the main ring in our circus, aka the 49ers.
    Maybe I haven’t been burned enough but it’s hard not to have raised expectations again this year. I said the same thing about Singletary too. Boy was that a Fail. I haven’t had such high expectations and so little result since my second wife…last year was like reliving a hellish marriage but shorter thank God.
    We’re all bored so politics get dragged in but over here it’s easy to disconnect from US issues and just kick back. I won’t discuss politics with my favorite brother as it just distracts from the really important issues like why is our older sister such a control freak and how did the middle brother turn into such a weasel. The favorite bro voted democrat and of course he’s an idealist but no use fighting fate (the moron), lol.
    I see where crabtree finally consented to grace the UQBs practice with his sulking presence. Big whoop. Show me lame ass. I swear this guy is working hard to inherit the UQB mantle of underachieving futility. As someone said recently poor performance is easier to take from someone who at least is trying to do the job.
    Sure glad I missed this V dude. Trusting Skeebs to keep him at bay. V = vampire?

  33. Del Mar DennisNo Gravatar says:

    V = vagina.

  34. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    NF Your false idignation and hypocrisy is transparent so it’s obvious to anyone who cares.
    Often you post little political jabs such as liberal idealogue,
    talking donkey and donkey feed.
    Then when posters who share your political agenda make political statements you never cry foul.
    The majority of posters jump from blog to blog including yourself.
    Doea that make you a troll too?

    And then you go and say I have personal issues? If I do then you have serious mental problems.

    You can’t stay on topic and talk football? You decide to become politician and start slinging mud.

  35. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    While it’s only a player arranged workout with a new playbook, it will allow for some informal discussion on what nuances have to be learned.
    Crabtree was quoted as working on routes alone so, I’ll assume he’s been using the Harbaugh playbook already?
    It’s nothing but light conditioning at this point but, I’ll give them all credit for taking the time to get familiar with the system together, can’t hurt can it?

  36. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    Well, that’s the rub. Some guys are begging out of this to prevent injury. But really, this is flag football without the flags.

    They aren’t even facing defenses.

  37. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    I hear you Chuck, it’s at least a topic related to football activity for whatever that’s worth.
    It’s risky for any of these guys to participate but, it’s conditioning nonetheless.
    Until the CBA is settled, we got Alex and Crabtree to keep us entertained.

  38. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    NF What you consider inside jokes really crossed the line
    IMHO you are king of the double standard.
    Maybe you should take a look at who’s attacking who here.

    Calling my siater a crackwhore and saying you know I have personal problems is outright phuckin slander.

    Cut the BS that you’re the victim here you sanctimonious fool.
    It is obvious you dish it but you can’t take it.

    I have no agenda here. Just because I agree with Harbaugh on Smith I’m supposed to feel the wrath of you?

    Case in point you chastised berger in the last thread
    June 4th, 2011 at 1:05 pm
    by telling him you didn’t appreciate him bringing up a topic here that you posted on SF Gate. Yet it’s OK for you to cite
    things I’ve posted on SF Gate and villify me here for it?
    Is this registering in your thick skull yet Mr Double Standard?
    Grow up or grow a pair.

  39. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    Looks like the fans are doing a little housecleaning amongst themselves. That could be good if it winds up they agree to disagree.
    Also seems the fans are releasing a little pent up frustration towards the UWR and his me first attitude. Well good there too. Clearing the air so to speak. Certainly highlights problems he’s got with the UQB, VD and being a team player. This is getting old already. I’m guessing he doesn’t work out here and is gone. I’m sure curious to see what coach makes of this.
    OK Bergs, gonna try the nabisco again…

  40. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    Way too early to make any predictions for this effort in Team unity but, I will give Crabtree his due for showing up.
    The question still focuses on his ability and determination, to improve timing with ‘his’ Routes and ‘The QB’.

  41. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Adam Snyder and draftee Kilgore are showing up for today and the rest of the week.
    One starter who’s a no show that the media is not picking up on is Chilo Rachal.
    He’s one guy that should be there.
    If he has a legit excuse that’s one thing but until then where the hell is he?

  42. Philippine FanNo Gravatar says:

    Also Baas, where is he? Trying to drive up the price I’ll bet…

  43. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    NF The old “Wait there’s more”
    On this thread you said “I think it’s insulting when folks inject a patisan political slam out of the blue and then say, “but I don’t want to get started on the political rants.”

    Look at the “Hang Him High” thread
    and tell me what that was all about Mr Double Standarded Hypocrite.

    I will say this, although I didn’t agree with Bush I always
    gave him the respect that all the Presidents of the United States deserves. Still clinging on to the lunatic fringe concept Birther?

    Sarah Palin is not an elected official but a well paid celebrity on Fox just like Paris Hilton, but you go out of your way to defend this dingbat bimbo
    everytime she puts her foot in her mouth.

    Haven’t you learned that payback is a bitch? What’s next on your troll political agenda?

    Keep attacking with your little peashooter and you’ll feel scorched earth.

  44. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    New post is up.

2021 Schedules
09/12: W 49ers 41, Lions 33
09/19: W 49ers 17, Eagles 11
09/26: L Packers 30, 49ers 28
10/03: L Seahawks 28, 49ers 21
10/10: L Cardinals 17, 49ers 10
10/17 BYE
10/24: L Colts 30, 49ers 18
10/31: W 49ers 33, Bears 22
11/07: L Cardinals 31, 49ers 17
11/15: W 49ers 31, Rams 10L
11/21: W 49ers 30, Jaguars 10
11/28: W 49ers 34, Vikings 26
12/05: L Seahawks 30, 49ers 23 12/12 · 10:00 AMCIN
12/19 · 1:05 PM v ATL
12/23 · 5:20 PM v TEN
01/02 · 1:05 PM v HOU
01/09 · 1:25 PM @ LAR

2021 Draft Class
1. QB Trey Lance, North Dakota State
2. OG Aaron Banks, Notre Dame
3. RB Trey Sermon, Ohio State
3. CB Ambry Thomas, Michigan
5. OG/OT Jaylon Moore, Western Michigan
5. CB Deommodore Lenoir, Oregon
5. S Talanoa Hufanga, USC
6. RB Elijah Mitchell, Louisiana
2021 Prognostications
Bullit: 12-5
Grumpy: 13-4
NJ49er: 11-6
Skeebers: 14-3
Winder: 12-5
Rob: 17-0
Spitblood: 0-17