Looks like we’ll be getting a 17 game season in a year or two, with an extra wild card team in each conference. And only the top seeded team in each conference will get a BYE week in the playoffs.…
Blog Archives
Thumb Twiddling
Tagged with: 49ers, Bill Belichick, Drew Brees, Jed York, Kyle Shanahan, Sean Payton
Posted in Mindless Drivel
Posted in Mindless Drivel
2019 NFL Draft
It’s finally time for the 2019 NFL Draft. Three more days and John Lynch will be on the clock with the number two pick. Lynch had the number two pick two years ago and whiffed it. Solomon Thomas has been no better…
Tagged with: 49ers, Adam Peters, Aldon Smith, Dante Pettis, George Kittle, Jed York, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Martin Mayhew, Nick Bosa, Ronald Blair, Solomon Thomas, Trent Baalke, Trent Taylor
Posted in Draft Board
Posted in Draft Board
Return of the Jed
It was only a matter of time. For the past two years, Jed York has been quiet, almost invisible. Leaving Kyle Shanahan and John Lynch alone to do their jobs. Over the weekend, however, word leaked out of 49er HQ that York had…
Tagged with: 49ers, Ahkello Witherspoon, Antone Exum, Dickhead Sherman, Jason Verrett, Jed York, Jimmie Ward, Jimmy Garoppolo, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Marcell Harris, Odell Beckham, Tarvarius Moore
Posted in The Usual Suspects
Posted in The Usual Suspects
Bring Me Your Lame …
The first week of Free Agency has come and gone. A lot of players changed teams and a lot of money changed hands. With the money being tossed at players these days, the “don’t let your kids play football” arguments are…
Tagged with: 49ers, busted arm) Tartt, Dee Ford, Dickhead Achilles Tear, Jacquiski Tartt, Jason Verrett, Jed York, Jimmie Ward, John Lynch, Jordan Matthews, Kwon Alexander, Kyle Shanahan, Paraag Marathe, Tevin Coleman
Posted in Delusional Therapy
Posted in Delusional Therapy
High Anxiety
Meanwhile, back here in the bottom feeder section, this will be the fourth consecutive year the 49ers have drafted in the top ten. Consistency is usually a good thing, but not in this case. Oakland Raiders owner Mark Davis is doing…
Tagged with: 49ers, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Mark Davis
Posted in Vacant Observations
Posted in Vacant Observations
Staff Roulette
The 49ers leapt into the new year by firing their D-line coach, their Trainer, and their Strength & Conditioning fellow. The first pink slip is a bit puzzling since the D-line was one of the few areas of competence last…
Tagged with: 49ers, Antonio Brown, Chip Kelly, Jed York, Jim Tomsula, Kyle Shanahan, Odell Beckham
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
Bring Your Gum Wads
The Chicago Bears come to town this weekend, fresh from clinching the NFC North division. They would be more tempted to mail this game in if not for the falling fortunes of the Rams which have suddenly made the last…
Tagged with: 49ers, Adrian Colbert, Bears, Jacquiski Tartt, Jed York, Jim Tomsula, Jimmie Ward, K'waun Williams., Nick Mullens, Reuben Foster, Vic Fangio
Posted in Game Previews
Posted in Game Previews
Buccaneers 27, 49ers 9
The 49ers responded to HC Kyle Shanahan‘s BYE week exhortations and threats by laying a turd Sunday in Tampa Bay. There were some bright spots littered within the fecal display. Rookie WR Dante Pettis got some playing time and caught 4 passes…
Tagged with: Dante Pettis, Deforest Buckner, George Kittle, Jed York, Kyle Shanahan, Matt Breida, Reuben Foster, San Francisco 49ers, Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
It’s Crowded at the Bottom
As the 2018 season enters the home stretch, many of you have already cast your thoughts forward to the 2019 season. And some of you have evidently dozed off and lost all interest. But the Outsider is duty bound to stay the course…
Tagged with: 49ers, Blake Bortles, Fred Warner, George Kittle, Jed York, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Mike McGlinchey, Reuben Foster, Robert Saleh, Trent Taylor
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
Worst a Shire Marathon
The Battle of the Bottom Feeders begins Sunday! Mark your calendars! Don’t miss one minute of excruciating awfulness! Sunday’s game against the Arizona Cardinals has the added benefit of being a battle for last place in the NFC West. Currently,…
Tagged with: 49ers, Cardinals, CJ Beathard, Giants, Jed York, Jimmy Garoppolo, Raiders
Posted in Game Previews
Posted in Game Previews
Rams 39, 49ers 10
Judging by the score, you’d think the 49ers’ defense had a really bad day. But 27 of the Rams 39 points came on drives of 27, 21, 34, 27, and 13 yards. And another two on a blocked punt safety. The…
Tagged with: Aaron Donald, CJ Beathard, Dwight Clark, Jared Goff, Jed York, John Lynch, Los Angeles Rams, Ndamukong Suh, Reuben Foster, San Francisco 49ers, Solomon Thomas, Todd Gurley, Weston Richburg
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
Caveat Emptor
Last call for NFL knuckleheads to crash their careers and wind up in the mug shot room. This time next week, they’ll all be back in the loving arms of coaches and baby sitters, safe from themselves. If the NFLPA…
Conference Title Games
Bleccccchh! And another tedious NFL season bites the dust. Next up, two weeks of shameless, overhyped, self-aggrandizing nausea. Fortunately, this is a 49er site and we can legitimately ignore the whole pile of steaming hot crap. Sorry, but apparently I’ve…
Tagged with: 49ers, Alex Smith, Brian Hoyer, Colin Kaepernick, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, Jimmy Garoppolo, Kyle Shanahan
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
49ers 34, Rams 13
The Rams laid down like dogs, to quote possibly the only memorable thing Phil Simms ever said. With 17 substitutions to their starting lineup, they were no match for the rejuvenated 49ers, who easily swamped the B squad from L.A.…
It’s Been Real
For the third consecutive year, the 49ers will travel to Chicago late in the season for a game against the Bears. The Third Annual Loser Litmus Test Game. Three years ago, then HC Jim Tomsula was handed a fluke OT…
Tagged with: Chicago Bears, Chip Kelly, Jed York, Jim Tomsula, Jimmy Garoppolo, John Fox, Johnny Manziel, Kyle Shanahan, Mitch Trubisky, San Francisco 49ers
Posted in Waltzing Matilda
Posted in Waltzing Matilda
First vs Worst
The 49ers travel to Philadelphia this weekend for what will probably be a systematic and thorough disembowelment. The Eagles have the best record in the NFC and unless they fall apart down the stretch in a typical Philly meltdown, they…
Tagged with: 49ers, Eric Reid, Ezekiel Elliott, Jacquiski Tartt, Jed York, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Philadelphia Eagles
Posted in Game Previews
Posted in Game Previews
Vikings 32, 49ers 31
Sunday night in Minnesota, the 49ers achieved something we haven’t see much of the past couple of years — they played an entertaining game. The offense looked NFL-like the entire game, and the defense was good in the first half.…
Tagged with: 49ers, Brian Hoyer, CJ Beathard, Jed York, Kyle Shanahan, Raheem Mostert, Vikings
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
The Dulcet Tones of Pad Whacking
The Singletary Hill is back at the 49ers’ Training Camp, in the form of a 30 degree ramp. And right away, sending chills down the spine of every reasonably cognizant fan, video emerged of Jed York chubbing and huffing his…
Tagged with: 49ers, Arik Armstead, Elvis Dumerville, George Kittle, Jed York, Jimmy Ward, Marquis Grissom, Reuben Foster, Trent Baalke, Trent Brown
Posted in Training Camp
Posted in Training Camp
The Long Road Back
By this time next week, the pads will be on and the 2017 NFL season will be officially grunting with activity. When Jed York hired John Lynch and Kyle Shanahan, he mentioned the word “culture” about a thousand times. Restoring…
Tagged with: 49ers, Chip Kelly, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, Jim Tomsula, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Kyle Williams, Mike Nolan
Posted in Training Camp
Posted in Training Camp
Light It Up
Happy Independence Day, fellow citizens. In honor of this day, we will consume 150 million hot dogs, 71% of them covered with mustard. We will also spend $800 million on fireworks while decreasing the air quality by 42%. This day…
Take a Number
The 49ers close out their offseason practices this week. If you gleaned any useful information from these sessions, congratulations. Your drug of choice has served you well. Joe Montana‘s recent birthday was a painful reminder that we once had recognizable,…
Tagged with: 49ers, Jed York, Joe Montana, Joe Staley, John Lynch, Kyle Shanahan, Navorro Bowman
Posted in Organized Team Activities
Posted in Organized Team Activities
So Far, So Good
New GM John Lynch had a fairly sensational debut in his inaugural Draft, collaborating seamlessly with new HC Kyle Shanahan. They worked so well together, you could almost feel Jed York itching to jump in and take credit for their…
Tagged with: 49ers, Adam Peters, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, John Lynch, KD Cannon, Kyle Shanahan, Martin Mayhew, Paraag Marathe
Posted in Draft Reaction
Posted in Draft Reaction