The 49ers play an exhibition game against the Raiders Saturday, and yesterday I paid the Raiders the ultimate disrespect by deeming them too insignificant to waste any words describing their woefulness or even summoning any concern that they were on the 49er schedule. Today, I feel a little more feisty.
As Rob pointed out in yesterday’s comment section, they suck. Not only do they suck, but they are a ridiculous organization of epic proportions. If Oakland had any character, it would run these bums out of town. But if it had any character, it would never have allowed these traitorous scumbags back into town in the first place.
Cleveland gets a lot of ridicule in the football spheres of America, but can anyone imagine that city or its fans being spineless enough to let Art Modell bring his team back into the city he so cowardly betrayed? Not on your pea-pickin’ life. That’s precisely why Oakland deserves the piece of shit franchise it now has.
That this franchise has even a single “fan” left on planet earth would be a mystery to me if it were not for my belief that the earth is overrun with a whole lot of idiots. That is the only worth that the Raiders have — helping to identify these idiots. Selling them Raider jackets and tattoos so the rest of civilization can quickly recognize that a dangerous piece of cretinous flotsam is in the vicinity.
That a decrepit old man is running this organization is absolutely fitting, because the Oakland franchise is living almost exclusively on the fumes of its long ago past. In the last decade, it has rotted like an abandoned old barn. That the team occasionally wins games is a testimony to the talent of NFL players of any kind and has nothing to do with any cognitive processes occurring in the bats flying around in the rafters of team management.
Al Davis WAS a sharp cookie once. He had a team that was fun to root for. But plain old greed, and a healthy dose of arrogance, poisoned his soul and rewired his brain. He turned into Captain Crusader, bent only on his own coronation, and began the long and insulting urination on his own fan base, treating the rabid Oakland rooters like they were dime a dozen schmoes.
This colossal embodiment of vanity and pride rubbed it in the Oakland faces but good, taking his team to the hated Los Angeles market, where the lazy fans yawned in his face. Why did Oakland take this jerk back? A mystery. Since his return to the Bay Area, this burnt out relic has flopped and floundered his way into the laughingstock of the league.
The only thing that keeps the Raiders alive is their logo — it appeals to the disenfranchised wannabe outlaws running around randomly harming anything in their vicinity. You think those painted up clowns in the Black Hole bear any resemblance to the true fans that sat there thirty years ago? No effing way. These current drunken half-wits weren’t even born when the Raiders were The Raiders. They are clueless punks. The only black hole in Oakland is the one where investors’ dough gets tossed for the likes of Javon Walker.
The Oakland Raiders will never recover as long as Davis is running the show. It is a cursed franchise. The black outs that routinely speak loudly for the city’s disinterest will continue. The product on the field has not won more than five games for seven consecutive seasons — an all time NFL record for uselessness.
Many people think the Raiders will be a competitive team this year and break through that five win barrier. The irony is that if they do, it will be entirely due to the organization’s repudiation of Davis, which manifested itself when JaMarcus Russell was dumped and Jason Campbell was brought in to replace him. It continued when the team drafted Rolando McClain in round one, instead of some speed burner joke.
The Bay Area would love to see the Raiders become relevant again. Then it would actually mean something to say “Screw the Raiders! You suck!” As it is, who needs to scream it? It’s just a fact. Raiders suck. What’s for dinner?