It’s Been Real

For the third consecutive year, the 49ers will travel to Chicago late in the season for a game against the Bears. The Third Annual Loser Litmus Test Game.

Three years ago, then HC Jim Tomsula was handed a fluke OT victory over Chicago that gave the team a 4-8 record and led him to prance around for a week like a guy who’d just signed a five year contract extension. The delusional joy was short-lived, however. The following weekend, Jed York brought his family to Cleveland to witness the turned-the-corner Niners trash the Browns, only to absorb Johnny Manziel‘s drubbing of the same-old Niners. Unde exitus Tomsula.

Last year, the Bears joined the rest of the league not named the Rams and whooped up on the Niners, adding to their eventual 13 game losing streak. And unde exitus Chip Kelly.

This year will be the rubber match, featuring the Bears’ rookie QB Mitch Trubisky against the 49ers’ newly acquired QB Jimmy Garoppolo. However, this year, win or lose, there will be no exiting undies for current HC Kyle Shanahan.

Nope. We have been assured by York that Shanahan is the really real deal, unlike Tomsula who was the real deal until Kelly came along a year later and became the realer deal who would be here many years and now a year later we have Shanahan who is the realest real deal of all.

At the end of next year, the Niners will have finally paid off Tomsula’s contract. Kelly will still have a year to go on his. But Shanahan, as if to pound home the point of how undeniably real he is, will still have four more years on his contract.

As for Chicago HC John Fox, he’s simply toast. Gone baby gone. No real left in his undies.

A final cheery thought: York will probably someday reach the age of 60 or 70 and become an elder statesman in the NFL. Nobody here wants to live long enough to see that ugliness. So keep it in mind when the day of your croaking has arrived. Embrace the exitus with a smile of relief.

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Posted in Waltzing Matilda
24 comments on “It’s Been Real
  1. winderNo Gravatar says:

    I really don’t see anyone pounding anything in this game. I figure it will be won by the team that makes the least mistakes. Not holding my breath.

  2. NoFearNo Gravatar says:

    Who doesn’t like a good Waltzing Matilda? Annual Loser Litmus Test is funny as hell even if totally unnecessary these days.

    Last year Kelly benched Shit7torm in the fourth quarter after gaining like five yards passing at that point and taking too many sacks to count (record shows 1 of 5 attempts completed for 4 yards, all day) (Why can’t he get a job?).

    Somebody needs to make a low-lights video from that game to play every time someone cries about collusion to keep numbnuts out of the NFL.

    What with the bar being set so low one might think the only way to go from there was up. Apparently not.

    Since then, Gabbert has moved on to a real team and the remaining Niners team looks worse than they did last year.

    Kneel downs proved to be Shit7torm’s favorite play, on and off the bench.

    Pro football took a backseat to look-at-me anti-American protests and end-zone celebrations.

    Long-term guaranteed coaching contracts for short-term coaches continue to show Jed York and the entire York circus for the absolute fools they are.

    Can it get worse? You bet.

  3. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    Thanks, NoFear. Matilda hasn’t been waltzing much lately, but it’s always fun when she does.

  4. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Kelly assumiong the UCLA job saves the Niners quite a bit of coin

  5. winderNo Gravatar says:

    That will make the bean counters happy.

  6. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Let’s not forget the huge favor the Bears gave the Niners in last years draft that yielded Solomon Thomas, Ruben Foster and ultimately Jimmy G..
    1. 49ers move down from #2 to #3 so Chicago can take Trubisky, also get #67 and #111 picks

    2. 49ers swap #34 pick for Seattle’s pick at #31, and throw in the #111 pick they just got from the Bears, take Ruben Foster

    3. 49ers then trade the #67 pick they got from Chicago to NOLA for pick #229 and NOLA’s 2nd round pick in 2018

    4. 49ers trade their 2nd rounder to New England for Garoppolo

    So the 49ers turned what they got from Chicago to move down 1 spot into Ruben Foster and Jimmy Garoppolo and all they are giving up is the difference between their 2nd round pick and NOLA’s 2nd round pick.

  7. winderNo Gravatar says:

    Nice. I think last years draft will end up being a very good one. I just hope Joe Williams turns out to be what’s advertised. Colbert’s a keeper and so is CJ and kittle, and Taylor.

  8. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    IMHO we need to take a pass rusher first. You don’t get a lot of top ten picks and shots at a top level guy. After that, take O-linemen until day three. Because we need three new guys next year – I’m *NOT* counting on Garnett to make a full comeback until I see it, and the other guys are shit. Maybe an ILB if one is a good fit somewhere in there.

    Wait until 2019 to worry about WR and CB.

  9. winderNo Gravatar says:

    Grump- we have taken pass rushers with the 1st pick for the last 3 years. I totally agree about the Oline. We probably need at least five more. I feel we need some playmakers on offense. Unless Jimmy G. totally stinks we are probably set at QB. Now’s the time to give him some real weapons. I am all for using every draft pick on offense and use FA for the D. If we spend the right kind of money we should be able to be competitive next year.

  10. winderNo Gravatar says:

    I have never see a team draft just offensive players unless maybe the Ricky Williams fiasco. But my point is it is time to really fix our offense. Whether we pick em up with FA or the draft makes no difference to me. I am not a fan of Carlos Hyde even though he has had a pretty decent year. I think we need a top grade running back because if what they say about Jimmy G’s quick and accurate release is true our WR’s should be ok. I would take the shot with Barkley if he’s there.

  11. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    49ers inactives:

    RB Jeremy McNichols
    DB Antone Exum Jr.
    DE Pita Taumoepenu
    DE Aaron Lynch
    OL Tim Barnes
    NT D.J. Jones
    DE Tank Carradine

  12. winderNo Gravatar says:

    I really thought Lynch was gonna play today. They must not think to highly of Carradine either.

  13. winderNo Gravatar says:

    Another red zone failure. At least we are moving the ball so far.

  14. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    Frank Gore has 34 yards rushing. He passes Jerome Bettis to move into sixth place on NFL鈥檚 all-time rushing list.

  15. winderNo Gravatar says:

    should be a 1st ballot HOFer

  16. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Impressed by Garrapolo’s first half considering the lack of talent at WR. He’s making the Oline look good because he’s decisive on where the ball is going.

    Jimmy G is a big upgrade over Beathard because he’s decisive and accurate and has a stronger arm.

  17. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    With 58 yards, Colts RB Frank Gore now has 13,694 yards to move past LaDainian Tomlinson and into fifth place on the NFL鈥檚 all-time rushing list.

  18. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    We have three times the number of first downs (18-6) as the Bears – and we are losing. Just goes to show how much a couple of mistakes can skew things.

  19. NoFearNo Gravatar says:

    …and almost triple the offensive yardage, but failing to cross the goal-line makes winning pretty tough.

  20. NoFearNo Gravatar says:

    I’m impressed that Garoppolo didn’t make his first start on his knees.

    The o-line is protecting him like they never did his predecessor.

    But run blocking is gone. All but one or two runs in the first half went outside and never worked.

  21. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    When was the last time we successfully ran a two minute drill and won a game on the road?

    Yeah it was a flawed game, but still.

  22. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Niners ran 73 plays to the Bears 36 with time of possession 38:47 to 21:09. That’s how you help your defense by limiting their exposure on the field.

    Did the Niners have a three and out today? I don’t remember one. When’s the last time you could say that about this offense?

    This was a GPS game that we might remember that turned it all around, just like the game at Philly in Harbaugh’s first year.

  23. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    Most impressed with Jimmy’s poise in the pocket.
    Stands comfortably, doesn’t elude his protection, keeps his eyes down field.
    He seems to have a very keen awareness too, regarding where the pressure is coming from as well, when it does get through.
    Something that comes with the development at the QB position. The game is still too fast for CJ and, with time, he should feel more comfortable as well.
    Jimmy gets the ball out quickly as well, which always makes the Pass Pro look better.

    Kudos to Goodwin and Taylor today.
    Both guys came up big when it mattered.
    Just enough of Hyde and Breida to keep the Bears Defense honest as well.

    In the end….Robbie’s Revenge.
    Gould – 15
    Bears – 14


  24. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    New post is up.

2021 Schedules
09/12: W 49ers 41, Lions 33
09/19: W 49ers 17, Eagles 11
09/26: L Packers 30, 49ers 28
10/03: L Seahawks 28, 49ers 21
10/10: L Cardinals 17, 49ers 10
10/17 BYE
10/24: L Colts 30, 49ers 18
10/31: W 49ers 33, Bears 22
11/07: L Cardinals 31, 49ers 17
11/15: W 49ers 31, Rams 10L
11/21: W 49ers 30, Jaguars 10
11/28: W 49ers 34, Vikings 26
12/05: L Seahawks 30, 49ers 23 12/12 路 10:00 AMCIN
12/19 路 1:05 PM v ATL
12/23 路 5:20 PM v TEN
01/02 路 1:05 PM v HOU
01/09 路 1:25 PM @ LAR

2021 Draft Class
1. QB Trey Lance, North Dakota State
2. OG Aaron Banks, Notre Dame
3. RB Trey Sermon, Ohio State
3. CB Ambry Thomas, Michigan
5. OG/OT Jaylon Moore, Western Michigan
5. CB Deommodore Lenoir, Oregon
5. S Talanoa Hufanga, USC
6. RB Elijah Mitchell, Louisiana
2021 Prognostications
Bullit: 12-5
Grumpy: 13-4
NJ49er: 11-6
Skeebers: 14-3
Winder: 12-5
Rob: 17-0
Spitblood: 0-17