Gloat Sandwich

The 49ers and Packers had a pretty good rivalry in the late ’90s, albeit a bit one sided. Brett Farve had their number and knocked them out of the playoffs in 1995, 1996, and 1997. The Niners finally beat him in 1998, thanks to an uncalled fumble on Jerry Rice and a last second bullet to Terrell Owens for the winning TD.

The joy was short-lived. The following week, Garrison Hearst busted up his leg early in the NFC Championship game against Atlanta, and the Niners couldn’t overcome it.

They’ve had better luck against Aaron Rodgers, knocking the Packers out of the playoffs in 2012 and 2013. Symmetry demands that we knock them out again this year so we’re all squares with the past.

Actually, the perfect symmetry would have been for the Seahawks to beat Green Bay, then come to Santa Clara and get beat by the Niners when they get an end zone interception off Russell Wilson that seals the victory and causes Dickhead Sherman to rant and spit uncontrollably at his former team. A reverse outcome from the 2013 season.

Denied that scenario, we’ll just have to be content in the knowledge that Wilson and Pete Carroll are home this week, suffering terribly from yet another year of failure, getting up each morning to the awful realization that they are losers, agonizing over the inches of destiny that the football gods will not overturn to save them from the finality of defeat. Six months of offseason hell to live through. Sigh. How delicious.

It’s possible the 49ers will be sad this time next week, too. Not nearly as sad as the Seahawks, but sad is sad, let’s face it. The networks would be sad, too, if the SB ends up Titans vs Packers. The two smallest markets in the league, with not a hint of significant history or glamor for the Tennessee team.

Nope, the world wants to see 49ers vs Chiefs in the SB. Especially after that ugly duckling last year that featured no offense at all. One more win, fellas, one more win.