Analyze This

Two years ago at this time, Mike Singletary had just fired Mike Martz and was embarked on a highly visible search for the guy who would become his Offensive Coordinator. It was gripping drama. One by one, candidates were interviewed and either discarded or seen scurrying out of town as fast as possible. After a month long torturous ordeal, Jimmy Raye emerged from the barren landscape as the stunning, uh, winner.

Jim Harbaugh is now looking not only for an OC, but also a DC. Yet hardly any drama is involved. There is a sense that these hires are not nearly as significant to the success of the team as was Singletary’s hire. And that Harbaugh will fill these vacancies quickly and competently.

It’s tempting to say that fans know in their hearts whether they should be worried or not. What comes out of fans mouths can be alarmingly disconnected from this heart knowledge, but there was no doubt to even the Singletary supporters — and I was one of them — that hiring Raye was a huge ass meh.

No such qualmfulness nags at the hearts of 49er fans today. Life is quite capable of displaying itself in bitch robes, and any sort of disaster might lurk out there in the future, but for now, for this month, we got this one right.

Happiness is kind of boring, though. Adam and Eve were the first ones to figure this out and look what happened to them. The pursuit of happiness is okay. Anything goes in that one. But once you have it, the first thing you want to do is make it more interesting. More challenging. More fun. Otherwise, a good lobotomy would be high on everyone’s list of what they wanted for Christmas.

Most fans seem to be floating the “who will be our QB” panic balloon currently. I can’t get too sweaty about this one just yet. Anybody we have at that position next year will be better than what we’ve had, simply because they’ll be in charge of a real offense, with some real game plans, and not an offense picked up at a going out of business thrift shop sale. Even if David Carr runs the offense next year, the team will be improved. Harbaugh will find somebody to develop. It’s what he does. I’m setting the QB panic alarm clock for 2012. The year Harbaugh has to “take the next step” past whatever step he takes this year.

This year, I’m worried about our secondary. We need a top flight cornerback more than we need anything else on the team. The only way we can compete next year is to improve our pass defense. It lost more games for us in 2010 than our offense did. Maybe it was a good enough defense if Peyton Manning was our QB, but he wasn’t. And he won’t be this coming year, either. If I see one more year of our CBs playing ten yards off the line of scrimmage on every play and still managing to get beat deep, I will lose my happiness in a heartbeat. I might even be tempted to wonder if Harbaugh knows enough about defense to be a winner in this league.

Obviously, I’m having withdrawal problems from last week’s furious excitement. I may have to enlist a volunteer to, like, call me a retard or something. I’m thinking maybe our Yukon correspondent needs to step it up here. Toss some turds on the fire. Get the flames of controversy kindled. This happy face is starting to hurt my jaw. Maybe the WOTD will be EatMyShorts. That might do it.

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Posted in Angst 101
14 comments on “Analyze This
  1. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    If we have to be autoschediastical with our QB for a year, fine. But I would like to at least draft one to develop.

  2. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Skeebs- You are a retard!. I don’t believe that, I’m just trying to help you out. I’m sure others will be happy to help too!

  3. TonyNo Gravatar says:

    Mornin Skeebs…yes the atmosphere in niner land has sure changed…I see posts were fans write “whoever Harbaugh pics is fine” whether its QB OC , DC ..whatever his choices for those postions great …defer to Harbaugh!! … the culture has really changed … i feel very content that our beloved niners are in competent hands again. I read that Harabaugh is confident he’ll get a good QB in the later rounds of the draft…my gut feeling is Dalton. And the first pic would be CB or Dline …and i believe Niners will make a play for Asomugha….god i wish they’d get that CBA done……go niners!!

  4. unca_chuckNo Gravatar says:

    Yeah Skeebs. I’ve been on the Prince bandwagon for a while. However, he may not be there.

    Unlkie all the mock-wonks out there, I think the Niners should take Von Miller. He’s a 3-4 OLB that led the league in sacks. He’s fast and sheds blockers pretty well. If they can’t cover, they need a pass rusher NOW. This guy could step right in and make an impact.

  5. unca_chuckNo Gravatar says:

    All the other mock-wonks that think we should draft Gabbert/Mallet/Newton.

    The 2nd to 4th round QBs are basically the same as any other QB in this draft not named Andrew Luck. Dalton, Stanzi, Devlin all can be developed into something good. I need to see who’s going to be FA as far as QBs go. Trading for Kolb/Flynn may be too costly.

    No fricking way . . .

  6. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    I would not go after Kolb. If the RFA tender on Flynn is 4th or lower, try to get him.

  7. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Our CBs got torched because they played so deep. In order to cover the sort pass they had to bite aggressively, then they would get beat on the double move. The problem was Singletary. I have a hard time even blaming that on Manusky, and it was not the fault of the players who were being asked to do just what they did. Ding dong, Sing is gone. That is the best corner help we will receive for next year.

  8. FranchiseNo Gravatar says:

    Berger, I watched your dude with a tude #90 do his best impression of Ndamukong Suh. 


    Breathes fire. 


  9. bigtimNo Gravatar says:

    the biggest threat to Sings power base was Martz, I personally am not a big Martz fan but it was a huge error and set the team back big time with Raye.
    it also looks like Harbaugh is doing a slow methodical search for his staff with no knee jerk reactions this is nice to see just make it right Jimmy boy is all I ask.

  10. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    NoFear, you still like to knock heads on the Insider. I’m curious. Did FlyingV get the permanent pink slip? Did he return with a new screen name? I was thinking of writing an obit for him, to use on a dull summer day.

  11. unca_chuckNo Gravatar says:

    The biot mistake was that Sing didn’t have asomeone already lined up as a candidate to be the OC when he shitcanned Martz.

  12. unca_chuckNo Gravatar says:

    Skeebs, V went by Ura_Chick (in honor of guess who) and posted outlandishly optimistic things for about a month.
    If he reupped as someone else, I don’t know. I don;t post nearly as much as I used to over there.

  13. delmardennisNo Gravatar says:

    NoFear’s from the Yukon? Maybe he’s familiar with the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon.
    One day, after striking gold in Alaska, a lonesome miner came down from the mountains and walked into a saloon in the nearest town. “I’m lookin’ for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon!” he said to the bartender.

    “Well, we got her!” replied the barkeep. “She’s upstairs in the second room on the right.” The miner handed the bartender a gold nugget to pay for the whore and two botles of beer.

    He grabbed the bottles, stomped up the stairs, kicked open the second door on the right and yelled, “I’m lookin’ for the meanest, roughest and toughest whore in the Yukon!”

    The woman inside the room looked at the miner and said, “You found her!” Then she stripped naked, bent over and grabbed her ankles. “How do you know I want to do it in that position?” asked the miner.

    “I don’t,” replied the whore, “but I thought you might like to open those beers first.”

  14. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    I think I saw her cheer leading for the Vikings last year when we played them. Those were the biggest most physical cheerleaders I had ever seen. I immediately wanted one. I coudn’t find my bottle opener!

2021 Schedules
09/12: W 49ers 41, Lions 33
09/19: W 49ers 17, Eagles 11
09/26: L Packers 30, 49ers 28
10/03: L Seahawks 28, 49ers 21
10/10: L Cardinals 17, 49ers 10
10/17 BYE
10/24: L Colts 30, 49ers 18
10/31: W 49ers 33, Bears 22
11/07: L Cardinals 31, 49ers 17
11/15: W 49ers 31, Rams 10L
11/21: W 49ers 30, Jaguars 10
11/28: W 49ers 34, Vikings 26
12/05: L Seahawks 30, 49ers 23 12/12 · 10:00 AMCIN
12/19 · 1:05 PM v ATL
12/23 · 5:20 PM v TEN
01/02 · 1:05 PM v HOU
01/09 · 1:25 PM @ LAR

2021 Draft Class
1. QB Trey Lance, North Dakota State
2. OG Aaron Banks, Notre Dame
3. RB Trey Sermon, Ohio State
3. CB Ambry Thomas, Michigan
5. OG/OT Jaylon Moore, Western Michigan
5. CB Deommodore Lenoir, Oregon
5. S Talanoa Hufanga, USC
6. RB Elijah Mitchell, Louisiana
2021 Prognostications
Bullit: 12-5
Grumpy: 13-4
NJ49er: 11-6
Skeebers: 14-3
Winder: 12-5
Rob: 17-0
Spitblood: 0-17