Noooooope! Neeeeeeeeeeext! The 49ers’ washed up, overpaid backup QB led the team to a 45-16 walloping in Buffalo Sunday, completing 45% of his passes, getting sacked three times, fumbling once, producing the lowest point total of the year, and generally…
Blog Archives
Bills 45, 49ers 16
Tagged with: 49ers, Arik Armstead, Bills, Chip Kelly, Deforest Buckner, Eli Harold, Eric Reid, Jed York, Phil Dawson, Trent Baalke
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
Return of the Jerk
The 49ers are five games into the 2016 season and already the year is a lost cause. So, why not re-insert a lost cause at QB? At this point that is just cosmetic whimsy. It’s GM Trent Baalke‘s hand picked…
Cardinals 33, 49ers 21
The 49ers and Cardinals spent the first half of their Thursday night game trying to cure the nations’s insomnia problem. Then, just before the first half ended, the Niners discovered they had a 7-0 lead and needed to jump start…
Tagged with: 49ers, Blaine Gabbert, Cardinals, Chip Kelly, David Johnson, Drew Stanton, Jed York, Jeremy Kerley, Larry Fitzgerald, Tramaine Brock, Trent Baalke
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
And the Least Shall Be Last
The 49ers and Cardinals meet tonight in a battle for the basement in the NFC West. That the Niners are engaged in this sort of tawdry affair is no surprise, but Arizona has been a surprise disappointment thus far in…
Tagged with: 49ers, Arik Armstead, Bruce Arians, Cardinals, Carlos Hyde, Carson Palmer, Dak Prescott, Deforest Buckner, Drew Stanton, Glenn Dorsey, Jake Delhomme, Jim Mora, Navorro Bowman, Quinton Dial, Russell Wilson, Trent Baalke
Posted in Game Previews
Posted in Game Previews
Cowboys 24, 49ers 17
For one shining quarter, the Chip Kelly offense lived up to its hype. The 49ers roared out to a 14-0 lead, scoring their second TD one minute into the second quarter. From there on out, it was Cowboys 24 and…
Tagged with: 49ers, Arik Armstead, Blaine Gabbert, Carlos Hyde, Chip Kelly, Colon Crapperdick, Cowboys, Deforest Buckner, Ezekiel Elliott, Jeremy Kerley, Quinton Patton, Torrey Smith, Trent Baalke
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
Lame Owners’ Bowl
The Jeckyll and Hyde 49ers return home this weekend to play the Cowboys, hoping the Doctor is in and not the other guy. The howls have already begun to yank Blaine Gabbert and try one of the other bust QBs…
Tagged with: 49ers, Antoine Bethea, Blaine Gabbert, Carlos Hyde, Chris Davis, Dak Prescott, Dallas Cowboys, Dez Bryant, Doug Baldwin, Jerome Kearse, Jerry Jones, Jimmie Ward, Jimmy Graham, Rashard Robinson, Seattle Seahawks, Tony Romo, Tramaine Brock, Trent Baalke, Tyler Lockett
Posted in Game Previews
Posted in Game Previews
Seahawks 37, 49ers 18
The Seahawks hadn’t scored a touchdown in their first two games of the season, but it only took three plays and 43 seconds to remedy that ailment against the inept 49ers Sunday in Seattle. They added three more, tossed in…
Tagged with: 49ers, Anquan Boldin, Blaine Gabbert, Carlos Hyde, Chip Kelly, Christine Michael, Deforest Buckner, Doug Baldwin, Greg Roman, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, Jim Tomsula, Jimmy Graham, Quinton Patton, Seahawks, Trent Baalke
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
Panthers 46, 49ers 27
The 49ers dusted off the old rope-a-dope strategy Sunday versus Carolina by lulling the Panthers to sleep with an endless stream of three and out punts, counting on the Panthers to get careless with the ball. It worked! They got…
Tagged with: 49ers, Ahmad Brroks, Andrew Tiller, Carlos Hyde, Fozzy Whittaker, Greg Olsen, Jimmie Ward, Joshua Garnett, Kelvin Benjamin. Blaine Gabbert, Marcus Martin, Panthers, Star Lotulelei, Trent Baalke
Posted in Post Game Spread
Posted in Post Game Spread
Disarray Juggernaut
The Santa Clara 49ers. Bwaaaaahaaaahaaa!! Wow. What a mess these clowns have become. Is this a football franchise or a sensitivity session for late bloomers discovering their “blackness,” complete with throw back ’70’s afros to help sell the sincerity? Maybe…
Tagged with: 49ers, Aaron Burbridge, Jed York, Jeff Driskel, Jim Tomsula, Trent Baalke
Posted in Waltzing Matilda
Posted in Waltzing Matilda
The Hour of the Turk Draws Near
One last practice game Thursday night before the Santa Clara Titanic sets off on its 2016 cruise. It might also be the last game of Colin Kaepernick‘s NFL career. The game against San Diego will be played mainly by members…
Tagged with: 49ers, Anquan Boldin, Colin Kaepernick, Jed York, Trent Baalke
Posted in Exhibition Season
Posted in Exhibition Season
Return of the Prodigal Son
One more preseason game before we can forget about preseason games even though there will be one more preseason game to endure. Friday’s game against the Packers is mainly meaningful because it will mark the first time since the middle…
Tagged with: 49ers, Blaine Gabbert, Chip Kelly, Colin Kaepernick, Corey Lemonier, Marcus Rush, Packers, Tank Carradine, Trent Baalke
Posted in Exhibition Season
Posted in Exhibition Season
Up the Down Staircase
The 49ers currently have 39 players on the squad that were selected from the 2013 – 2016 drafts. NaVorro Bowman is the only guy left from the 2010 draft. Nobody left from 2008, 2009, and 2012. Only Colin Kaepernick, Daniel…
Tagged with: 49ers, Bruce Miller, Colin Kaepernick, Corey Lemonier, Daniel Kilgore, Deforest Buckner, Eric Reid, Jed York, Navorro Bowman, Quinton Dial, Quinton Patton, Tank Carradine, Trent Baalke, Vance McDonald
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
Tortoise vs Hare Redux
While the Seahawks, Cardinals, and Rams duke it out this year for NFC West supremacy, the 49ers will be involved in a whole different kind of competition. Two in fact. For one. they’ll be competing for the Number One pick…
Tagged with: 49ers, Byron Maxwell, Carson Wentz, Chip Kelly, Demarco Murray, Eagles, Howie Roseman, Jed York, Jeff Lurie, Jim Harbaugh, Kiko Alonso, Tom Gamble, Trent Baalke
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
Long Odds
Your faithful scribe has been offline for a couple of weeks. In my absence, the 49ers have apparently been flying under the radar also, content to remain inconspicuous while the Warriors, Sharks, and Giants capture the attention of the Bay…
Tagged with: 49ers, Alex Boone, Anquan Boldin, Chip Kelly, Deforest Buckner, Hue Jackson, Jed York, Jim Harbaugh, Jim Tomsula, Jimmie Ward, Joshua Garnett, Navorro Bowman, Scot McCloughan, Tramaine Brock, Trent Baalke, Zane Beadles
Posted in Orgainized Team Activities
Posted in Orgainized Team Activities
He Gotta Be He
OTAs begin this week. Unless they were last week and I missed them. Just to be fair and cover my bases, I’ll miss them this week, too. Everyone is talking about Chip Kelly and his “system” these days. A couple…
Tagged with: 49ers, Chip Kelly, DeSean Jackson, Jarryd Hayne, LeSean McCoy, Trent Baalke
Posted in Orgainized Team Activities
Posted in Orgainized Team Activities
Chips Ahoy
We’re half way through the offseason, GM Trent Baalke has left the stage, and from here on out it’s the Chip Kelly show. That’s fine. We can get our teeth into Kelly. His results will be immediately evident from the…
Tagged with: 49ers, Chip Kelly, Colin Kaepernick, John Elway, Trent Baalke
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation
2016 Draft
GM Trent Baalke departed from form on Thursday’s first round by actually drafting players the 49ers need, instead of his usual BPA blather. Zounds! That was in the first round. Two guys (DeForest Buckner, Joshua Garnett) who must be starters…
Tagged with: 49ers, Deforest Buckner, Fahn Cooper, John Theus, Joshua Garnett, Rashard Robinson, Ronald Blair, Trent Baalke, Will Redmond
Posted in Draft Board
Posted in Draft Board
The Banjo Hitter as GM
Wow. The Draft. Is there any way we can outsource this thing? It’s worse than the Super Bowl hype week. It’s on every channel. Every talk show. Every blog. Endless mocks. Endless endlessness. Help!! Don’t get me wrong. The draft…
Move Along, Nothing To See Here
It’s been a quiet offseason for the 49ers so far. Nobody has been arrested for anything or made the news for bad behavior. The team is now both mediocre and boring. This deadly dynamic could change in a couple of…
Opening Bell
The Chip Kelly era officially began Monday morning when the team gathered in Santa Clara for the first offseason workouts and team meetings. The prelude to the era revealed that Kelly belongs to the school of coaches who deal with…
Tagged with: 49ers, Chip Kelly, Jed York, Jeff Lurie, Jim Harbaugh, Trent Baalke
Posted in The Usual Suspects
Posted in The Usual Suspects
The Bust Maker
The 49ers haven’t come right out and admitted it, but their inactions during the Free Agency period have made it clear they have no intention of trying to be competitive this year. They are not even faking it. The 2016…
Tagged with: 49ers, Brandon Thomas, Bruce Ellington, Chip Kelly, Colin Kaepernick, Corey Lemonier, Jed York, Jim Tomsula, Marcus Martin, Quinton Patton, Tank Carradine, Trent Baalke, Vance McDonald
Posted in FOS Speculation
Posted in FOS Speculation