Blog Archives

Visiting the Uglies

Sunday marked the end of life without football. R.I.P. hunk of shit dead air time. The 49ers tee it up Thursday night against the Ravens. Can’t wait to see Jewel Hampton blowing through holes opened up by Al Netter and

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Posted in Training Camp

The Downward Spiral

The longest day of the year slipped through town last Friday and Saturday morning the earth began its long, slow journey into darkness. I mention this for the benefit of all you squirrel worshippers out there, as a reminder to

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

Wake Me When The Game Begins

The game cannot come soon enough. 100 mouths, 2,000 microphones, and still 5,000 game analyses to go before the kickoff. I put my head in the sand yesterday, but it didn’t work. There were two ostriches down there talking about

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Posted in Vacant Observations

The Coma Before the Storm

For the past eighteen years, the last two weeks in January have been reserved for denial, anger, depression, avoidance — all the classic pysche tricks to deal with another disappointing end to the 49ers’ season. I was still a young

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

The Final Eight

The Ravens’ uniforms are really butt ugly. And Ray Lewis’s absurd pregame preening ritual should never have been televised once, let alone ten thousand times over twelve years. Take some dance lessons, Ray. An acting coach wouldn’t hurt either. Better

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Weak Previews

The NFC seems noticeably stronger than the AFC this year. Only the Vikings, Bucs, and Rams look like possible punching bags in the NFC, while the AFC has a bucketful of laughers — Dolphins, Browns, Titans, Jags, Colts, and maybe

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Posted in Around the League

R-E-S-P-E-C-T (just a little bit)

Harbaugh vs Harbaugh, Lewis vs Willis, Gore vs Rice, and Ravens D vs Niners D. These will be the story angles that will be beaten to death by the time Thursday’s game kicks off. We do not intend to flog

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Posted in Game Previews

CSI: Blogosphere, USA

As pointed out here by a Patriots fan Sunday (and expounded on by our foreign correspondent), Baltimore Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis said the crime rate would rise if the lockout went on too long. I had been thinking that same

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

The Exorcist

Rams quarterback Sam Bradford has been publicly wringing his hands about having to learn a new playbook in his second season. Ha ha. Whiner. Try learning a new one every year for five straight years, Sam, then get back to

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Posted in History 01100101
2017 Schedule
Sept. 10: vs Carolina: L 3-23
Sept. 17: at Seattle: 9-12
Sept. 21: vs. L.A. Rams: L 39-41
Oct. 1: at Arizona: L 15-18
Oct. 8: at Indianapolis: L 23-26
Oct. 15: at Washington: L 24-26
Oct. 22: vs. Dallas: L 10-40
Oct. 29: at Philadelphia: L 10-33
Nov. 5: vs. Arizona: L 10-20
Nov. 12: vs. N.Y. Giants: W 31-21
Week 11 — Bye
Nov. 26: vs. Seattle: L 13-24
Dec. 3: at Chicago: W 15-14
Dec. 10: at Houston: W 26-16
Dec. 17: vs. Tennessee, 1:25 p.m.
Dec. 24: vs. Jacksonville, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 31: at L.A. Rams, 1:25 p.m.
 
2017 Draft Class
1. DE Solomon Thomas
1. ILB Reuben Foster
3. CB Ahkello Witherspoon
3. QB C.J. Beathard
4. RB Joe Williams
5. TE George Kittle
5. WR Trent Taylor
6. DT D.J. Jones
6. LB Pita Taumoepenu
7. CB Adrian Colbert
 
2017 Prognostications
Bullit: 5-11
Chuck: 9-7
Grumpy: 4-12
Mr Fletch: 5-11
NJ49er: 6-10
Rob: 9-7
RTFirefly: 5-11
Skeebers: 6-10
Winder: 4-12

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