Blog Archives

The Long Road Back

By this time next week, the pads will be on and the 2017 NFL season will be officially grunting with activity. When Jed York hired John Lynch and Kyle Shanahan, he mentioned the word “culture” about a thousand times. Restoring

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Posted in Training Camp

Tweedledum and Tweedledee

For the third straight year, the 49ers are beating the bushes looking for a new regime to hopefully convince a skeptical fanbase that they know what they’re doing. Unfortunately for them, the fanbase is, by now, 100% sure that this

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Aiming For Infamy

Some good games on tap for Thanksgiving this year. Minnesota vs Detroit for NFC North supremacy, Dallas vs Washington for the NFC East, and Pittsburgh vs Indianapolis for two teams trying to stay alive in crappy divisions. The 49ers won’t

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Posted in Game Previews

Chip and the Dip

Chip Kelly introduced himself to the Bay Area media Wednesday. It went well. None of the grunting, mumbling, sweating, stammering, furtive and incoherent rambling made notorious by his inept predecessor Jim Tomsula. Crisp, witty, intelligent. Terrific. If this was 2011,

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

Streaky Clean

Twelve games into the 2015 season, the 49ers have yet to win so much as two games in a row. They’ve lost four in a row, and have a couple of two game losing streaks, but all four victories this

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Posted in Game Previews

Seahawks 29, 49ers 13

The 49ers kept their road record perfect on Sunday in Seattle, losing 29-13 for their fifth consecutive road loss. Once again, it was the defense that led the way to defeat as Seahawks backup RB Thomas Rawls bulled through them

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Recycling Center

Blaine Gabbert. Not exactly a power-packed name. Kind of dribbles off your tongue like a fumbled hike from the center. But, Blaine it is. And he has one sure thing going for him: he’s not Colin Kaepernick. We’ll find out

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Posted in Game Previews

Baalke’s Decade

With the departures of Patrick Willis, Ray McDonald, Michael Crabtree, and Frank Gore, the Mike Nolan/Scot McCloughan draft era is just about wrapped up. There are only two guys left: Joe Staley and Vernon Davis. And only one FA signing

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Baalkan Island

For the next two months, it will be GM Trent Baalke‘s turn to show us what he can do. Free agency begins in two weeks, followed by the draft in late April. Everyone seems to be clamoring for a fast

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Bourbon Street Blues

What a depressing week. Losing to the Rams, at home, is always depressing, but this time it was also embarrassing. The loss to a team that had no business even being in the game set off tremors to the franchise.

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Posted in Game Previews

Broncos 42, 49ers 17

I haven’t turned off a 49er game in the third quarter since probably as far back as the Mike Nolan era, but this puppy was going nowhere fast and when Colin Kaepernick tossed an interception and the Broncos immediately cashed

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Dead Air

The NFL has finally grunted out the 2014 schedule, giving starved football fans something tangible to munch on. (Ed note: not sure this image is suitable for children) The 49ers are an 11 to 13 win team, no matter who’s

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

The Ten Four Clubs

With one week left before the beginning of Free Agency, the 49ers have yet to re-sign any of their 12 pending free agents. That’s 23% of last year’s season ending roster in danger of going bye-bye. Of course, some of

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Bye Bye Candlestick

There’s a 49er football game Monday night, but it will be somewhat overshadowed by the hoopla surrounding the final game to be played at Candlestick before the team moves to Santa Clara next year. If the Cardinals lose Sunday in

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Posted in Game Previews

Lowered Expectations

Bouquets have been pouring into 49er HQ this week, with encouraging sentiments such as “GET AN OFFENSE, YOU STINKING BUMS!” OC Greg Roman seems to be getting the most bouquets, followed closely by QB Colin Kaepernick and the group politely

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Posted in Delusional Therapy

Alas, Poor Yorick

Watching former 49er head coach Mike Nolan’s Atlanta defense get shredded Monday night by the Jets(!) and failing to protect the lead in the last two minutes of the game was a painful reminder that it was not so long

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Fall From Grace

This is normally the time we disparage our upcoming opponents and scoff at any notion they might be able to beat the mighty 49ers. Two wallopings in a row kind of takes the swagger off the mighty, though. I hope

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Posted in Game Previews

Southern Discomfort

The 49ers made their first player cuts from 90 down to 75 fairly painlessly. A few camp fodder lads were released, Parys Haralson was traded to the Saints, and about ten guys were pushed off the roster and stashed onto

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Posted in Waltzing Matilda

The Third Year

For those of us with fertile imaginations or ravenous little children, Peter Cottontail will be hop, hop, hopping into view this weekend, and I’m sure we all breathlessly await his arrival. In keeping with the Tradition perversion fetish of the

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Posted in Waltzing Matilda

Git Along Little Dogies

Sunday was the first monthiversary of the 49ers ignominious Super Bowl defeat. Some of us have moved on and some of us haven’t. Not sure which category I belong in, so maybe there’s a third group of somes that are

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Posted in FOS Speculation

You Ain’t Got A Thing, If You Ain’t Got That “Ing”

The NFC Championship Game will feature the number 1 and 2 seeds in the playoffs. How quaintly proper. And there are no wildcard entrants still in the running from either conference. Terrif! The four remaining teams all earned their way

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Posted in Vulcan Mind Probes

Down Goes Frazier

San Francisco 49er fans tuned in Sunday night to watch their Super Bowl contending team in action and were instead treated to a throwback game to the Mike Nolan era. The 42-13 drubbing by the Seahawks was their worst beating

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Posted in Post Game Spread
2017 Schedule
Sept. 10: vs. Carolina, 1:25 p.m.
Sept. 17: at Seattle, 1:25 p.m.
Sept. 21: vs. L.A. Rams, 5:25 p.m.
Oct. 1: at Arizona, 1:05 p.m.
Oct. 8: at Indianapolis, 10 a.m.
Oct. 15: at Washington, 10 a.m.
Oct. 22: vs. Dallas, 1:05 p.m.
Oct. 29: at Philadelphia, 10 a.m.
Nov. 5: vs. Arizona, 1:05 p.m.
Nov. 12: vs. N.Y. Giants, 1:25 p.m.
Week 11 — Bye
Nov. 26: vs. Seattle, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 3: at Chicago, 10 a.m.
Dec. 10: at Houston, 10 a.m.
Dec. 17: vs. Tennessee, 1:25 p.m.
Dec. 24: vs. Jacksonville, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 31: at L.A. Rams, 1:25 p.m.
 
2017 Draft Class
1. DE Solomon Thomas
1. ILB Reuben Foster
3. CB Ahkello Witherspoon
3. QB C.J. Beathard
4. RB Joe Williams
5. TE George Kittle
5. WR Trent Taylor
6. DT D.J. Jones
6. LB Pita Taumoepenu
7. CB Adrian Colbert
 
2016 Prognostications
Closest To The Pin
  Grumpy: 3-13
  Spitblood: 3-13
  Winder: 3-13
Bakkentom: 0-16
Bullit: 5-11
Chuck: 8-8, 7-9, 9-7, 10-6
Mr Fletch: 4-12
NJ49er: 5-11
Phil Fan: 4-12
Rob: 9-7
RTFirefly: 7-9
Skeebers: 6-10

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