Blog Archives

Trending Up Meets Trending Down

The Broncos were left for dead last month. Their record was 3-6. Now it’s 6-6, after dispatching the Chargers and Steelers, and they might just slip into the playoffs if they keep on winning. Imagine their delight to find the

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Posted in Game Previews

49ers 30, Lions 27

As expected, the 49ers rebounded from their loss in Minnesota to easily barely handle the toothless scrappy Detroit Lions. After controlling the game for three quarters, the Niners held a 17 point lead with 11 minutes to go in the

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Coming Attractions

Less than three weeks until the 49ers’ Training Camp opens and we start separating the men from the boys. One of my favorite times of the year. All the OTA standouts and over-hyped draft picks get their first taste of

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Cardinals 20, 49ers 10

The Cardinals and 49ers met for the second time this season and the results were pretty much the same. A deadly boring contest which Arizona won. 49er fans were apparently expecting this sort of performance, as the stadium was only

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Eagles 33, 49ers 10

What can I say? Another fun day in 49erville, as the boys ran their record to a clean 0-8, doggedly keeping pace with the Cleveland Browns in the empty barrel division. The 49ers are getting better and better at getting

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Washington 26, 49ers 24

Another week, another last second loss. The 49ers have developed an uncanny ability to almost, but not quite, win. Perhaps they will soon develop an uncanny ability to almost, but not quite, lose. It might have to wait a couple

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Cardinals 23, 49ers 20

Phew! That was close. The 49ers almost blew their shot at history on Sunday afternoon, but in the final two minutes of the game, they rallied to let Carson Palmer lead the Cardinals on a 12 play, 62 yard drive

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Lame Owners’ Bowl

The Jeckyll and Hyde 49ers return home this weekend to play the Cowboys, hoping the Doctor is in and not the other guy. The howls have already begun to yank Blaine Gabbert and try one of the other bust QBs

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Posted in Game Previews

Panthers 46, 49ers 27

The 49ers dusted off the old rope-a-dope strategy Sunday versus Carolina by lulling the Panthers to sleep with an endless stream of three and out punts, counting on the Panthers to get careless with the ball. It worked! They got

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Long Odds

Your faithful scribe has been offline for a couple of weeks. In my absence, the 49ers have apparently been flying under the radar also, content to remain inconspicuous while the Warriors, Sharks, and Giants capture the attention of the Bay

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Posted in Orgainized Team Activities

Standing Pat

Two weeks into the FA period, it looks like GM Trent Baalke has concluded that last year’s 5-11 record wasn’t the least bit his fault. No, the roster’s fine. The record was all the fault of Jim Tomsula and Colin

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Depleted Roster

It’s NFL Combine week, which means that February is down to its last useless week with a schedule of fittingly useless events that showcase certain peculiar athletic skills of a huge pile of college boys. All of this is a

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Halftime Highlights

Halfway through the season, the Niners have become the musical chairs franchise. QBs in, QBs out. RBs in, RBs out. CBs in, CBs out. TEs in, TEs out. RG and RT in and out and in and out. Apparently, our

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Training Camp 2015

The 2014 offseason will close up shop this weekend, taking its rightful place among the darkest chapters in 49er history. A truly ghastly effort by the dirtbag young owner and an insult to 49er fans everywhere. Next up, two weeks

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Posted in Training Camp

Job Listings

Only three more weeks before the bill starts coming due on Jed York‘s offseason catastrophe. Currently, there are four jobs up for grabs as we head into Training Camp: LDE, RCB, RG, and slot CB. The LDE winner will be

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Posted in Training Camp

Can Anybody Play This Game?

June is here, which means three more months until the grand opening of The Return to Mediocrity Era. Featuring an ever evolving cast of entirely forgettable coaches and players. Hip hip kerplunk! Today, we’ll look at the 2012 Draft class,

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Posted in FOS Speculation

49er 2015 Draft Recap

The results are in and we now know the names of the ten players who will waste their first year in the NFL learning schemes and systems from lousy coaches who will be fired in a year or two. Enjoy

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Posted in Draft Reaction

Washington Circus Comes To Town

Washington comes to town this weekend to remind us all that, whatever our problems are or are perceived to be, some franchises have infinitely worse crap to deal with. This game should be a walkover, but the 49ers don’t do

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Posted in Game Previews

Suck It Up or Just Suck

For the past three years, 49er fans have been able to count on a shutdown defense to make them more than competitive in every game the team played. So far this year, that is not the case. In the Arizona

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Posted in Game Previews

Cardinals 23, 49ers 14

For the third consecutive week, the 49ers jumped out to a first half lead, then imploded in the second half. The lead was big enough in the first game to withstand the brown out, but last week and this week,

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Bears 28, 49ers 20

The 49ers embarrassed themselves Sunday night, turning an easy win into an ugly loss, and christening their brand new stadium with a layer of stink normally associated with descriptions of toilet overflow at the Oakland Raiders’ facilities. The 49ers new

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Posted in Post Game Spread

49ers 21, Chargers 7

The spectacular 49er offense sputtered and clanked its way to a blowout 21-7 victory Sunday afternoon. After the starters got off the field, that is. Those bums played five and a half minutes into the second quarter and produced three

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Posted in Post Game Spread
2018 Schedule
9-9, L: Vikings 24, 49ers 16
9-16, W: 49ers 30, Lions 27
9-23, L: Chiefs 38, 49ers 27
9-30, L: Chargers 29, 49ers 27
10-7, L: Cardinals 28, 49ers 18
10-15, L: Packers 33, 49ers 30
10-21, L: Rams 39, 49ers 10
10-28, L: Cardinals 18, 49ers 15
11-1, W: 49ers 34, Raiders 3
11-12, L: Giants 27, 49ers 23
11-25, L: Tampa 27, 49ers 9
12-2, L: Seattle 43, 49ers 16
12-9, W: 49ers 20, Broncos 14

12-16: vs. Seattle, 1:05 pm, Sun.
12-23: vs. Bears, 1:05 pm, Sun.
12-30: @ Rams, 1:25 pm, Sun.
 
2018 Draft Class
1. OT Mike McGlinchey
2. WR Dante Pettis
3. LB Fred Warner
3. DB Tarvarius Moore
4. DE Kentavius Street
5. CB D.J. Reed
6. S Marcell Harris
7. DT Jullian Taylor
7. WR Richie James
 
2018 Prognostications
Closest to the Pin:
  Mr Fletch: 7-9

Bakkentom: 8-8
Grumpy: 8-8
Winder: 8-8
Bullit: 9-7
NJ49er: 9-7
Skeebers: 10-6
Spitblood: 0-16
Rob!!!: 16-0

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