Blog Archives

Standing Pat

Two weeks into the FA period, it looks like GM Trent Baalke has concluded that last year’s 5-11 record wasn’t the least bit his fault. No, the roster’s fine. The record was all the fault of Jim Tomsula and Colin

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Coming Soon: The Not Harbaugh Era

The NFC West has one team that knows it will be in the playoffs, one team that assumes it will make the playoffs, and one team that hopes to make the playoffs. And one team that will be wildly enthusiastic

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Posted in Training Camp

49ers 26, Eagles 21

A strange thing happened on the way to the 49ers’ third straight debilitating defeat. The defense remembered how to play all four quarters and the offense managed to dig out of a 21-10 hole and stumblebum its way to a

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Ravens 23, 49ers 3

On second thought, bring back the offseason! The 49ers suffered their ugliest loss since the first game of the Harbaugh Era, back in 2011 against the Saints. That game was 24-3 and this one was 23-3. Jim Harbaugh is now

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Orlando Gazette

49ers HC Jim Harbaugh says Frank Gore has three more good years left in his tank. He also says the team needs a 3rd WR who can get open and make plays. If this site endorsed sarcasm, we might reply,

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Sensible Shoes

The candidates to fill the shoes at nose tackle and free safety — Ian Williams and Eric Reid — both played well in the first exhibition game. The sky, which had been threatening to fall all down upon our 49er

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Posted in Training Camp

We’re Off and Stumbling

The 49ers opened the 2013 season with a 7 minute, 13 play drive that honked out in the Red Zone, forcing them to settle for a FG. Hmmm. That was the all too familiar script in the 2012 season, right

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Ambulance Ambiance

The unmistakable sounds of NFL football are pealing in the air throughout America now: “MEDIC! We have a man down here!” Achilles, Triceps, ACLs, MCLs — these are the dreaded words that signal a major, year-ending injury. The avant garde

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Posted in Training Camp

Roster Roulette

Last year, the 49ers returned all 22 starters on offense and defense. Ergo sumatra, there was no place for any of the 2012 rookies to squeeze into the starting lineup. That’s not the case this year. There are three vacancies

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Posted in Noggin Scratching

Bargain Hunting

The 2013 offseason has been a bit of a yawner so far. Not that we expected much more. When you have fourteen draft picks, it’s pretty obvious where the mustard will be squoozed this year. Getting Anquan Boldin for virtually

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Sixteen Reasons

The Twitter news feed has been bonkering hot this week, for those of you who are Twitterholics. Leave the computer to take a leak and when you get back there’s a message: “29 new Tweets.” Goodness! The Jets make the

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Posted in Vulcan Mind Probes

A Few Good Fat Guys

The 2013 Draft doesn’t have much buzz to it this year. Not only are there no superstar QBs in the draft, the top player might be an offensive guard! You can’t get much unsexier than that unless you attended a

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

The Suck Pit

Embarking on Day Three of Coping With Tragedy. Shock, denial, anger, grief, acceptance. Blah, blah, blah. This sucks. Holy banana peels! How could we not get that ball into the stinking end zone? Then again, why not? We beat ourselves

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Take It On Faith

This year’s 49er draft class is kind of boring. Nothing is expected from first round pick AJ Jenkins — this year. Fourth rounder, Joe Looney, is on the PUP list recovering from a foot injury. Fifth rounder, Darius Fleming, is

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Flavor of the Month

Last call for vanilla. We hope. Is anybody going to watch this game? Maybe the first quarter or half. The blackout was lifted in San Diego, so the stadium is going to be filled to the brim with invisible patrons.

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Posted in Game Previews

Open Season

Monday, July 25, 2011, the dirt bags who brought us an empty offseason finally announced a new CBA agreement, thus turning back on the lights of the NFL. We are pleased. The 49ers wasted no time before immediately gorging on

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Posted in Tuesday Morning Waterboy
2017 Schedule
Sept. 10: vs Carolina: L 3-23
Sept. 17: at Seattle: 9-12
Sept. 21: vs. L.A. Rams: L 39-41
Oct. 1: at Arizona: L 15-18
Oct. 8: at Indianapolis: L 23-26
Oct. 15: at Washington: L 24-26
Oct. 22: vs. Dallas: L 10-40
Oct. 29: at Philadelphia: L 10-33
Nov. 5: vs. Arizona: L 10-20
Nov. 12: vs. N.Y. Giants: W 31-21
Week 11 — Bye
Nov. 26: vs. Seattle: L 13-24
Dec. 3: at Chicago: W 15-14
Dec. 10: at Houston: W 26-16
Dec. 17: vs. Tennessee, 1:25 p.m.
Dec. 24: vs. Jacksonville, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 31: at L.A. Rams, 1:25 p.m.
 
2017 Draft Class
1. DE Solomon Thomas
1. ILB Reuben Foster
3. CB Ahkello Witherspoon
3. QB C.J. Beathard
4. RB Joe Williams
5. TE George Kittle
5. WR Trent Taylor
6. DT D.J. Jones
6. LB Pita Taumoepenu
7. CB Adrian Colbert
 
2017 Prognostications
Bullit: 5-11
Chuck: 9-7
Grumpy: 4-12
Mr Fletch: 5-11
NJ49er: 6-10
Rob: 9-7
RTFirefly: 5-11
Skeebers: 6-10
Winder: 4-12

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