Blog Archives

The Suck Pit

Embarking on Day Three of Coping With Tragedy. Shock, denial, anger, grief, acceptance. Blah, blah, blah. This sucks. Holy banana peels! How could we not get that ball into the stinking end zone? Then again, why not? We beat ourselves

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Super Bowl Face Plant

The 49ers gagged away their past and maybe their future Sunday night, losing disgracefully to the POS Baltimore Ravens 34-31. They were outcoached and outplayed by an inferior team in the biggest game of the year. Shameful. The 49ers had

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Posted in Post Game Spread

A Star Is Born

The San Francisco 49ers unleashed their nuclear powered offense Saturday night and blew the Green Bay Packers to smithereens. NFL pundit Ron Jaworski predicted that Jim Harbaugh would unleash Colin Kaepernick in the playoffs, and yea verily it came to

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Scheme Scream

The San Francisco 49ers squeezed by the Miami Dolphins Sunday afternoon, winning 27-13. It was not an impressive victory, but it did virtually guarantee that the team will make the 2012 playoffs. How far they advance in those playoffs is

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Posted in Post Game Spread

The Earth Moved

Wow. I didn’t see RGII’s debut game or Cam Newton’s last year, but given the national stage, the playoff implications, and the quality of the opponent, I don’t see how either of those guys could have been better than Colin

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Landslide Victory

The 49ers crushed the Arizona Cardinals 24-3 on Monday night, sending the team and its fans into the Bye week on a very happy note. As they say in the Life Duhs Anonymous meetings, two weeks of savoring always trumps

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Elsewhere and Back

The 49er players are respiting for two days, but the blogs are a 24/7 operation. And when there are no games, we make do with manipulating stats or replays for our little POV snow forts! Take that, POW! Back at

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Black and Blue Beat Down

Whew! Game ball to the 49er offensive line and Frank Gore. With the season on the brink of slipping away, the 49ers came out in the second half Thursday night, awoke from the fog that marked their first half efforts,

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Gut Check Game

Thursday night’s game is looking like the most crucial 49er game of the year. A Seahawks loss would give them an 0-3 division mark, probably handing the 49ers any tie breaker scenarios at season’s end. On the other hand, if

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Posted in Game Previews

Stinker on the Green

That was butt ugly, folks. Is it too soon to panic? The 49ers lost to the Giants 26-3, but it could have been a lot worse if the Giants hadn’t laughed their way through the fourth quarter. The game started

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Pay Back Time

Sunday’s game against the Giants is an NFC bragging rights game, but it’s also a game that will tell us how legitimate the 49ers’ new and explosive offense really is. And whether the defense can handle a legitimate QB or

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Posted in Game Previews

Demolition Crew

The San Francisco 49ers squeaked by the Buffalo Bills Sunday, edging them 45-3. This was the most balanced offensive beat down in the history of the NFL. 310 yards passing and 311 yards rushing. That is some scary shit, folks

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Legacy Lunacy

The 49ers have unleashed a devastating “wildcat” option to their potent running game this season, featuring backup QB Colin Kaepernick, who has thrived in the role. The result? A new wave of Alex Smith bashing!? If one hadn’t been around

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Posted in Vacant Observations

I Shoes

In a strangely candid moment, Greg Roman told the media Tuesday that Anthony Dixon would make the team. That means Rock Cartwright most likely won’t. It makes sense, I suppose, if you get your fingers in there for some careful

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Easy Peasey

Friday’s opening exhibition game was quite an improvement over last year’s opening debacle in New Orleans. I wish it meant something more significant than polite applause. Still, it was football and we now get to see it every week till

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Posted in Post Game Spread

Back To School Week

Theeeeey’re back! Most of them, anyway. Some. Okay, just the rookies and a few vets. But it’s once again “What have you done for me lately?” time. Last season? Old news. The team’s veterans won’t be reporting until Thursday, with

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Posted in Vacant Observations

Gone Fishing

The much ballyhooed offseason practices are in the books. Ballyhooed? Where were the flaming Tweets? The yellow headlines? The steaming trailers? True, there was little hoo in the bally, but the mere existence of offseason practices, where the 13-3 club

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Posted in Orgainized Team Activities

Nervous Nelly

The ignominious loss to the Baltimore Ravens a week ago Thursday night has sprinkled down drops of doubt upon the heads of the brethren in the 49er Village. The Harbaugh Mystique was wounded and the O-line was exposed. It was

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Posted in Angst 101

Champagne Brunch

Back to work week for our intrepid 49er lads who tasted defeat last Thursday for the first time since mid-September. Even in defeat, however, Dame Fortune remained kind to the team by sneaking into Seattle on Sunday and inducing the

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Posted in Mindless Drivel

Raise High the Roofbeam

Four more days till the 49ers kick off the 2011 season by slaughtering the helpless Seattle Seahawks. Four more days till I have to stop writing fiction and start reporting the truth. Sigh. The truth in these parts of the

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Posted in FOS Speculation

Beat The Clock

The Bay Area beat reporters have been milking the Jim Harbaugh/Alex Smith courtship almost daily, but this site, in deference to its readers who have gagging issues, has mostly demurred from squeezing that udder. None of these scribes actually expects

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Posted in Vulcan Mind Probes

Show and Tell

The 49ers opened their doors to the public Wednesday, and trotted out their three new coordinators for the Bay Area press to evaluate. These media intros aren’t so much for gathering any hard core news as they are for sizing

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Posted in Coachspeak 101
2019 Schedule
9-8: W 49ers 31, Buccaneers 17
9-15: W 49ers 41,Bengals 17
9-22: W 49ers 24, Steelers 20
9-29: BYE

10-7: W 49ers 31, Browns 3
10-13: W 49ers 20, Rams 7
10-20: W 49ers 9, Washington 0
10-27: W 49ers 51, Panthers 13
10-31: W 49ers 28, Cardinals 25

11-11: L Seahawks 27, 49ers 24
11-17: W 49ers 36, Cardinals 26
11-24: W 49ers 37, Packers 8

12-1: L Ravens 20, 49ers 17
12-8: W 49ers 48, Saints 46
12-15: L Falcons 29, 49ers 22
12-21: W 49ers 34, Rams 31
12-29: W 49ers 26, Seahawks 21


01-11: W 49ers 27, Vikings 10
01-19: W 49ers 37, Packers 20
02-20: L Chiefs 31, 49ers 20

2019 Draft Class
1. DE Nick Bosa, Ohio State
2. WR Deebo Samuel, South Carolina
3. WR Jalen Hurd, Baylor
4. P Mitch Wishnowsky, Utah
5. LB Dre Greenlaw, Arkansas
6. TE Kaden Smith, Stanford
6. OT Justin Skule, Vanderbilt
6. DB Tim Harris, Virginia
2019 Prognostications

Closest to the Pin:
   Bakkentom: 10-6
   Bullit: 10-6

Grumpy: 9-7
Skeebers: 8-8
Mr Fletch: 7-9
NJ49er: 7-9
Winder: 7-9