All the World’s a Stage

The first exhibition game is in the books. Ready to be moved to the basement. Next to the boiler. Ready for the winter fires.

Just kidding. Nobody has books anymore, or boilers, for that matter. Except in movies where mob guys incinerate the remains of their enemies.

Mob guys don’t have much accidental charm anymore, either. Today we have cartels. Faceless thugs dealing drugs. They might as well be government agents. For all we know, maybe they are. They don’t make people disappear or wear cement shoes on the ocean floor. No, these bums cut off your head and roll it down the street to thump their chests.

Drawing attention to yourself is very popular in football, too. Guy gains three yards off tackle, down 30 in the fourth quarter, and immediately hot dogs around like a baboon, hoping to draw the eye of the camera. I’m not sure when acting like a fool on TV became so popular. They even have shows that insult your existence before you even come on stage. “Who’s the Ugliest?” “Who’s the Dumbest?” And people line up to willingly compete.

The choreographed TD celebrations are the worst. It’s amazing that so many guys can actually spend time rehearsing something that is so staggeringly lame. It’s like they want the world to nod and go, “Yeah, they’re right. Football players are realllllllllllly stupid.”

The 49ers had six guys get injured in the first game. Supposedly, they’ll be ready to return by the first regular season game. That’s good news since it’s six guys we don’t have to worry about them getting injured during the rest of training camp and preseason.

But, hey, we don’t watch them for their brains. The past three years, we haven’t watched them for their football talents, either. Nothing will change about that until the season starts and the wins come along or not.



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52 comments on “All the World’s a Stage
  1. winderNo Gravatar says:

    As of now I still think we are probably an 8-8 team. But, that does remain to be seen. Injuries will kill us. Garcon is coming off a neck injury so he’s probably one hit away from retirement. Who really knows who’s gonna play guard for us. Our top 2 RB’s are shelved until the start of regular season if we are lucky. Kinda puts a little damper on the expectations. But so far just about every team has been hit by the bug.

    Skeebs- I been having to sign in for every post, is that a new thing or is it just my computer?

  2. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    I haven’t changed anything, Winder. Not sure what the problem is. I’ll do some research. Anybody else having this problem?

  3. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    The problem might be the new GDPR laws that require a commenter to approve of storing cookies (your info) on your computer. I’ve added an opt-in checkbox which should appear below the comment section. Let me know if this solves the problem.

  4. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    “The 49ers plan to sign RB Alfred Morris if he passes a physical.”

  5. winderNo Gravatar says:

    Thanks, gonna give it a try.

  6. winderNo Gravatar says:

    lets see

  7. winderNo Gravatar says:

    Yep that worked, thanks

  8. robNo Gravatar says:

    WOW we just signed Alfred Morris ! At 222 lbs. he and Mckinnon should make a nice combo !

    Morris was drafted in 2012 and has gone to two pro bowls in six seasons so far !

  9. robNo Gravatar says:

    Even better Shanny was Morris’ coach both times he went to the pro bowl

  10. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    Someone is going to have to go at RB. Breida? Williams?

  11. winderNo Gravatar says:

    My guess is Williams unless Morris is a good ST player.

  12. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Just a thought skeebs. First paragraph, did you consider using “in the can” instead of “in the books”? More appropriate for entertainment on film.

    Pardon me for pressing minutiae to its limit.

    Shanahan’s are famous for grabbing late round RB’s on the cheap but were OZ one cut, good field vision kind of runners. With the Glinch, Richburg, and Staley am wondering how many of our RB’s get 1,000 yds on the ground with 500 through the air.

    Got your prompt so no more retypes, thx.

  13. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    FYI

    The Cowboys placed backup offensive guard Marcus Martin on injured reserve. Martin tore a ligament in his right big toe during Thursday’s preseason opener.

  14. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    http://www.realclearlife.com/sports/lesean-mccoy-accused-of-beating-son-dog-in-lawsuit-filed-by-ex-girlfriend/

    So a source said this lawsuit will not affect Shady’s efforts with the team. Per Forbes the Bills had close to, if not were, the least valued of the NFL franchises.

    This saga probably drives their value further down. Will she be able to hire that celebrity lawyer or her daughter. This lawsuit is effectively a short on the franchise valuation.

    When Raiders exit Oakland will the Bills be moving to one of the crime capitals of Cali. They would fit right in.

  15. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Why the hell would another team move to Oakland?

    They will not put money up for a new stadium so no team would come to Oakland.

    For the time being Oakland is dead to the NFL and San Diego would be a better venue if a team would look for a new home.

    Also value of a franchise only comes into play if you are selling, otherwise it’s a paper number.

  16. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Report from today’s joint practice

    Jimmy G and the Niner receivers looking sharp

    https://www.49ers.com/news/10-observations-from-49ers-practice-against-texans-aug-16

  17. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Pro football Focus very detailed analysis of Ruben Foster in Cover 3 with film study

    https://www.profootballfocus.com/news/pro-nfl-film-focus-pff-breakdown-of-foster-cover-3

  18. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Colin at his finest. Contrast that with any Jimmy interview.

    https://youtu.be/XNN43pCycGo

  19. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/jim-harbaugh-ends-interview-after-kaepernick-compared-to-teenage-kid/

    Raiders owner Mark Davis joked on Sunday that the 49ers have stolen his team’s dysfunction. Maybe that wasn’t a joke

  20. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    They continue to fall.

    https://www.si.com/nfl/2018/08/17/isaiah-wynn-injury-torn-achilles-out-for-season-patriots

    https://www.buffalorumblings.com/2018/8/17/17736362/aj-mccarron-breaks-collarbone-in-buffalo-bills-cleveland-browns-preseason-match

    In order to move up to eventually draft Josh Allen QB at #7, Bills traded LT Cordy Glenn. Also had a starting OG retire in offseason from neck injury. McCarron got hit from Myles Garrett let through by Cordy Glenn’s replacement.

    We returned the solid of BB and trade of Jimmy by giving away Trent Brown, now their starting LT. Very fortunate for NE, now with Wynn lost for season.

  21. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    36 yd left sideline pass to marquise Goodwin from jimmy. CB Kevin Johnson injured on pass D. Finally got up and may have shoulder injury.

  22. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Juice big dump off pass to 2 yd line on 4th and 1.

    Staley on false start. Juice got back penalty yardage. McNichols slips no gain. Trent Taylor TD!

  23. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Bruce Ellington, ex 9er, killing us on quick timing passes and yac. TE fools safety coverage for big gain. TE got low catch by goal line.

  24. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    4th and 1. Ellington TD. Wow, LB and S coverage needs work.

  25. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Jimmy G hangs in the pocket and gives receivers a chance to get open.

    When #7 was at QB it was one look and run for your life with no thought to looking for receivers.

    It is refreshing to have a complete QB running the team who offers more threats from scrimmage.

  26. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    17 yd pickup by Garcon with NT pressure. Goodwin for 1st down on sideline. 4 yds for McNichol. Then 2. Trent got 5 for the 1st.

    McNichols for 6 yds to 28. Williams gets 2 on outside pitch. Hikutini on play action for big gain to 13. End of 1st quarter.

  27. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Clowney and Watt may not be in game.

    Holding on Richburg negates good run. Unsportsmanlike conduct also for double penal th on same man. Then INT by bade most with 3 man rush with tipped pass.

  28. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Weeden to Sammy Coates for big gain.

    Then Coyle breaks up pass to TE. Kevin Johnson CB out with concussion. Witherspoon good coverage on 3rd down pass, no good and punt. Pettis misses 4 tackles on return.

  29. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Dante Pettis 12 yd gain from Beathard. Jimmy 10 of 12 for 136 yds, 1 INT. CJB takes penalty illegal forward pass. 2nd and 18.

    Cole Wick pass maybe 10 yds. McNichols gets 5 but nailed by LB. Punt with fair catch.

  30. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Coates with man coverage beats 20 for 1st. 4 yd run. RB picks up 5 with shovel pass under pressure to Blue for 3rd and 1. Coates another,1st down off of 23. Witherspoon good coverage for a throw away.

  31. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Sheldon Day has Weeden sacked escaping pocket. Punt and fair catch by Taylor and 23 Witherspoon blocks with push on back to put us back more.

    Veterans Witherspoon, Staley, and a double on Richburg penalized so far.

    McNichols got 6 yds. McNichols then close to a 1st. 3rd and 1. McNichols got a good two for the 1st.

    CJB play action hit short man Hikutini for 7 plus a penalty.

    False start on Williams LT. Pettis hit in stride for pickup of 20 on a slant. Just overthrew a deep ball to Pettis. Now 3rd and 10 on 37. McNichols short by 3 yards and now punt. Instead line up for play then 2 min warning.

  32. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Punt with Mostert called for a Helmut hit foul. Bogus call. 10 yard hold on first run. Weeden pass deflected by Blair. Pass interference on 88 TE. Ellington gets 6 back. Weeden and Coates do opposite and incomplete. Weeden expects Coates to go long. Leche punts.

    Niners get ball with 1:08 left in half. Bademosi missed another tipped INT. McNichols gets 7 on short pass. Trent Taylor almost nabbed a contested pass to force a punt. Fair catch.

  33. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    92 Attachou gets a Helmut penalty for 15 yards. Weeden to Coates then hammered by Exum for incomplete. Then long ball thrown short and broken up. Another pass drop and end of half.

  34. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    In summary DeShawn Watson accurate to Ellington on short passes and intermediate throws to TE Ryan Griffith. Schemed open their receivers. Good job Houston O.

    Otherwise we did better. 2nd drive stopped by Richburg double penalty then tipped INT. Later CJB missed Pettis by only 2 yard overthrow on a deep ball. On 1st drive Pettis caught by a DE and could not get outside. He is not a Goodwin as far as top line speed.

  35. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    DeAndre Hopkins, Watt, and Clowney not in game. Why are we tied?

    Pope got to niner 45 on kick off. Flags. Offsetting fouls so rekick. Pope down at 22. Joe Webb a running QB is in now. Slides for a 1st down from pocket. 15 yards by Braxton Miller.

    Blue cut back and tackled by Warner for 1. Then DJ Reed breaks up short pass. Flag on Tarvarius Moore for pass interference call. Then Blue for 3 to our 31. Blue stopped for zero.

  36. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    3rd and 7. Two flags 15 yard on Helmut contact to QB head by Elijah Lee. Blue fumbles but they still recover it. Pope gets 5 yard pass in flat. Almost INT by Lee on a wheel route in end zone. FG for 10-7 lead.

  37. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    DJ Reed 42 yard kick return at 40.

    6 yd to Bourne. Then no gain rush. CJB batted down pass by DE. Punt and fair catch.

  38. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    My impression of last night’s game. Not good.

    Jimmy can only do so much. The IOL is not opening holes. How much of this is due to Garnett and Cooper late from coming back from injury.

    I never expected the inside run game to do well by itself. Richburg is too small. How much OZ has been run so far. Running game needs big time work. Two preseason games left.

  39. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Hard to evaluate the rushing game when you’re down to starting a guy 5th on your depth chart in McNichols.
    Pass protection was good for Jimmy G and allowed him to scan the field and find open receivers. His one bad pass resulted in a high throw that was tipped into an INT. Still 10/12 with over 11 yards a completion is impressive.

    Yes we’ll learn more from this Saturday’s game when starters should play an entire half and virtually nothing in game 4 when the starters all sit out for fear of injury.

  40. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    I put a lot of hope for this season in the trio of Tomlinson/Cooper/Garnett to handle OZ and pass pro. Am banking on them all doing above average. If so, two of them have tradeable contracts if that can help better us.

    Disappointed in Toomer so far. Also Attaochu and Marsh.

  41. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Can Inman’s view

    ” Offensive line: Before we gush praise, we must note that the Texans sat seven defensive starters, including pass-rushing demons J.J. Watt, Jadeveon Clowney and Whitney Mercilus, as well as leading tackler Benardrick McKinney and cornerback Jonathan Joseph. That said, excellent blocking kept Garoppolo clean in the pocket. Joe Staley, Laken Tomlinson, Weston Richburg, Mike Person and Mike McGlinchey are meshing well as a reconfigured unit, although Person only played the first series before yielding to Joshua Garnett and, late in the third quarter, Jonathan Cooper.
    It wasn’t all perfect, such as Richburg’s penalties and a still sub-par run game, the latter of which is impacted by Shanahan keeping the play calls vanilla and the top backs not yet turned loose.”

  42. Grumpy GuyNo Gravatar says:

    The offense looked pretty good until Richburg had an attack of Suddenly Stupid Syndrome.

    More concerned about the defense, which just has not impressed as a unit at all in either game.

    A lot to sort out in Game 3 before the meaningless 4th game and the start of the regular season, and time is getting very short.

  43. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    This coming game on Sat against Indy is make or break for Joe Williams.

    If he doesn’t show more desire and prove that he’s a great option and belongs he’ll be cut. Williams is fighting for his football life and on one play he did not sell out for the first down where hr clearly had the chance.

    These little things will make the difference come decision time.

  44. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Good stuff on NN. Here after the DAL preseason game:

    https://www.ninersnation.com/2018/8/10/17675806/game-1-analysis-dont-overreact-to-the-run-game-woes

    Does his run game analysis apply with HOU. Given this roster, do we have what it takes for OZ and WCO passing game for ball control time consuming drives?

    Interesting season ahead.

  45. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    137 mil investment supported with an unproven OL. They need to get real fast.

    HOU did not play with 5 of 11 starters. Cooper and Garnett need to play a half game total with each getting a quarter in first half.

  46. winderNo Gravatar says:

    It doesn’t look like we are gonna scare much of any team this year and we are definitely not SB ready. The bright side is that we should see quite a bit of improvement. This is probably the most important year in the rebuild the team will hopefully solidify and close up some of the many holes we still have. We will have to pick up some more OL’s in the draft/FA and it looks like some more RB’s are in order. DE seems to be the most crucial at present though and for us to be successful we have to get to the QB. Anyway, looking forward to some very fun/good football this year.

  47. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Must avoid what we are going to see in our next game.

    IND damaged their franchise QB with poor OL pass pro. Their scheme of Air Coryell with 7 step drops waiting on deep patterns did not help.

    What did IND do after Luck spent a year off rehabbing. Fire the HC. Basically their first two picks grabbed LG and RG. New HC uses WCO to protect QB.

  48. bullitNo Gravatar says:

    Trent Taylor is looking to improve on his rookie season

    https://tinyurl.com/ya8pjcxy

    Pettis also showing he can get open

    https://twitter.com/jco3215/status/1031286060985327616

  49. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    New post is up.

2018 Schedule
9-9, L: Vikings 24, 49ers 16
9-16, W: 49ers 30, Lions 27

9-23: @ Chiefs, 10:00 am, Sun.
9-30: @ Chargers, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-7: vs. Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-15: @ Packers, 5:15 pm, Mon.
10-21: vs. Rams, 5:20 pm, Sun.
10-28: @ Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
11-1: vs. Raiders, 5:20 pm, Thur.
11-12: vs. Giants, 5:15 pm, Mon.
BYE
11-25: @ Tampa, 10:00 am, Sun.
12-2: @ Seattle, 5:20 pm, Sun.
12-9: vs. Broncos, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-16: vs. Seattle, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-23: vs. Bears, 1:05 pm, Sun.
12-30: @ Rams, 1:25 pm, Sun.
 
2018 Draft Class
1. OT Mike McGlinchey
2. WR Dante Pettis
3. LB Fred Warner
3. DB Tarvarius Moore
4. DE Kentavius Street
5. CB D.J. Reed
6. S Marcell Harris
7. DT Jullian Taylor
7. WR Richie James
 
2018 Prognostications
Bakkentom: 8-8
Bullit: 9-7
Grumpy: 8-8
Mr Fletch: 7-9
NJ49er: 9-7
Skeebers: 10-6
Winder: 8-8

Spitblood: 0-16
Rob!!!: 16-0

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