Take a Number

The 49ers close out their offseason practices this week. If you gleaned any useful information from these sessions, congratulations. Your drug of choice has served you well.

Joe Montana‘s recent birthday was a painful reminder that we once had recognizable, even beloved, heroes playing for the 49ers. They’ve handed out so many new jersey numbers this offseason that we won’t even know who we’re rooting for until halfway through the year. NaVorro Bowman‘s 53 and Joe Staley‘s 74 are about all that’s left from a team we knew.

In fact, we know the guys who play for Arizona and Seattle better than we do our own team. And many of us, including this scribe, have gotten quite comfortable rooting against the Niners the past two years, as an enjoyable anti-York protest. The other team has gone 25-7 in that span, making Sunday football viewing eminently satisfying.

One thing that is crystal clear at this point: Kyle Shanahan is a lot better looking than his bug-eyed, maniac-stare father who obviously spent a lifetime using his teeth as a bottle opener. I remember wondering, when the elder was the OC here in the early 90’s, how somebody so strange looking could possibly command attention, short of hauling out a pistol and waving it around.

But enough with the heart-warming family portraits. There’s been a lot of speculation about whether the Niners will be improved this year and by how much. One thing that isn’t speculated is whether they will be a playoff contender. And that means, no matter how happy anybody is about the hiring of Shanahan and John Lynch, we’re still looking at enduring yet another dismal season. Hard to get excited about that.

Best bet is another year of rooting for the other team. Jed York will be uncomfortable, and that’s always good. And one more year with a high draft pick is probably a wise investment.




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13 comments on “Take a Number
  1. robNo Gravatar says:

    omg we got shanahan

  2. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    Hey, Rob. Still OMGing your way though life, I see.

  3. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    Well Skeebs…Shanny Sr spent time in Colorado.
    Gotta wonder if he has any connection to Dr Alphonse Mephesto in South Park?
    I’m convinced Jed does šŸ˜€

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEAJ741bxnY

  4. winderNo Gravatar says:

    I am hoping to see some real football this year. I am going with the glass is half full. If we totally stink up the place this year it will make me sad, last year it just made me mad. However, unlike last year when I knew we were gonna lose I got my sites set on a 4 win season. After all we are starting from scratch. I doubt I will think much about Jed this year unless he opens his mouth.

  5. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    LT Joe Staley: “This might sound kind of bad, but Iā€™m enjoying football again. Iā€™m excited to come to work every single day.”

  6. robNo Gravatar says:

    SKEEBS OMG seems you’re afflicted with the same malady these days lol

  7. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    Soon to be applying at Home Depot. Scrawny BLM hater got his last dig in against the system.

    https://www.outkickthecoverage.com/colin-kaepernick-compares-modern-day-police-slave-catchers/

  8. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    I doubt we’ve heard the last hurl from him. Flipping off whitey is his new career.

  9. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    http://www.49erswebzone.com/commentary/1694-yahoo-sports-writer-among-those-49ers-draft-marks/

    The 49ers could have also heard the same chatter. Selecting him that high was a small price to pay to guarantee themselves the only quarterback in the draft who Shanahan felt fit his scheme and someone who he has repeatedly compared to Kirk Cousins of the Washington Redskins ā€“ a player we know Shanahan loves. It was also a small price to pay for Lynch who wanted his head coach to rest well that night knowing he got his guy

  10. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    More QB talk. CLE has the better roster, the best OLine, but maybe the weakest of the three coaches (Gruden/WASH, Shanahan/SF, Hackson/CLE).

    CLE has a lot of draft capital to do a trade. What to do with DeShone Kizer and Brock Osweiler.

    https://www.ninersnation.com/2017/6/24/15867556/kirk-cousins-count-down

  11. bakkentomNo Gravatar says:

    CLE has a very young team with lots of potential. Their risk is QB. Why squander the non-QB talent. Being a winner will also keep LT Joe Thomas on board. His contract is like Alex Mack’s so he could walk after this season.

    CLE is now built to win. They will not be a top 5 in 2018 draft. It’s now or never.

  12. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    New post is up.

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2017 Schedule
Sept. 10: vs. Carolina, 1:25 p.m.
Sept. 17: at Seattle, 1:25 p.m.
Sept. 21: vs. L.A. Rams, 5:25 p.m.
Oct. 1: at Arizona, 1:05 p.m.
Oct. 8: at Indianapolis, 10 a.m.
Oct. 15: at Washington, 10 a.m.
Oct. 22: vs. Dallas, 1:05 p.m.
Oct. 29: at Philadelphia, 10 a.m.
Nov. 5: vs. Arizona, 1:05 p.m.
Nov. 12: vs. N.Y. Giants, 1:25 p.m.
Week 11 ā€” Bye
Nov. 26: vs. Seattle, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 3: at Chicago, 10 a.m.
Dec. 10: at Houston, 10 a.m.
Dec. 17: vs. Tennessee, 1:25 p.m.
Dec. 24: vs. Jacksonville, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 31: at L.A. Rams, 1:25 p.m.
 
2017 Draft Class
1. DE Solomon Thomas
1. ILB Reuben Foster
3. CB Ahkello Witherspoon
3. QB C.J. Beathard
4. RB Joe Williams
5. TE George Kittle
5. WR Trent Taylor
6. DT D.J. Jones
6. LB Pita Taumoepenu
7. CB Adrian Colbert
 
2016 Prognostications
Closest To The Pin
  Grumpy: 3-13
  Spitblood: 3-13
  Winder: 3-13
Bakkentom: 0-16
Bullit: 5-11
Chuck: 8-8, 7-9, 9-7, 10-6
Mr Fletch: 4-12
NJ49er: 5-11
Phil Fan: 4-12
Rob: 9-7
RTFirefly: 7-9
Skeebers: 6-10

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