Feb 21, 2013 Mindless Drivel
The 2013 Draft doesn’t have much buzz to it this year. Not only are there no superstar QBs in the draft, the top player might be an offensive guard! You can’t get much unsexier than that unless you attended a nude photo shoot of the Extremely Ugly Women’s Society for their annual calendar which is distributed throughout China to discourage reproduction.
Perhaps the Combine events this weekend will change the landscape, but for 49er fans it doesn’t much matter. The team will be drafting next to last in each round, which is a long way from the titillation room.
The 49ers have fourteen picks in the coming draft, twice the norm, but six of them are in the sixth and seventh rounds and the two fifth rounders are near the bottom of that round. So it would be a more than a pleasant surprise to see any of those picks make an impact in the coming season. In fact, it’s still questionable how much impact our 2012 draft will have on the coming season. Except for LaMichael James, the 2012 class was a season long no-show.
The key to this draft is likely to be the third round, where the 49ers have three picks — their own, a compensatory, and the Panthers pick acquired last year in a draft day trade. Which means from the bottom of the second round to the bottom of the third, Trent Baalke will be drafting FOUR players. Defensive linemen will be targeted, which may put an end to the mostly bench time careers of Ian Williams, Demarcus Dobbs, and Will Tukuafu. Adding to the D-line uncertainty is the pending free agency of Isaac Sopoaga and Ricky Jean-Francois. This is a key draft for the future of the defense. Get it right, and we’ll continue to have a top ten D. Get it wrong and hello mayhem.
One last note for those of you who will be flying to Indianapolis with your stopwatches for this weekend’s dash times, be advised that it is better to let the air out of the bag along the way. According to a recent study, that was actually conducted and apparently paid for, it is healthier to go ahead and play the butt trumpet rather than stifling yourself. Men have always known about this fun and humorous health aid, but women tend to view gas as an evil and disgusting menace. The study also concluded that female emanations tend to be stinkier than the male bombast variety, so perhaps that explains the bad attitude women have towards this subject. At any rate, blast away guys. It’s doctor’s orders!