Next up on the 49ers sack and pillage tour of the NFC North are the Minnesota Vikings. A few years back, the Vikes had the Williams Wall that prevented anyone from running up the middle on them. Age and PEDs have crumbled that wall. Throw in Jared Allen, the defensive end whose only concern is rushing the passer, and you have the makings of a big time running game for the 49ers this coming Sunday.
The other thing working in the 49ers favor is the Vikes are basically not a very good team. Usually, this will get you beat in the NFL. Adrian Peterson will gain a modest amount of yards, Allen might get a sack or two, Christian Ponder will have a respectable QBR, but the Vikes won’t get the ball into the end zone — and the 49ers will. Case closed. Next!
After the game, the team will once again hole up in Youngstown, Ohio to prepare for next week’s game against the Jets in New Jersey, rather than endure two cross country airplane flights. The Debartolos pretty much own Youngstown. It must be nice to own a town. I started off in life wanting to own my own island. Then I scaled down to a ten acre spread with a castle and a moat. Then it was a house. Now, I’m just happy to own my shoes.
It’s a Wild West sort of deal, owning your own town. “Hi, stranger. I’m P.J. Buttwipe. I own this town and everyone in it.”
This puffed up announcement is then followed by a gunslinger who’s a good type of killer coming into town and shooting all of Buttwipe’s hired henchmen and finally Buttwipe himself, and returning the town to the citizens who don’t know what to do with it, so they move somewhere else and the town dies. Or the gunslinger burns it down.
Not Youngstown, though. The Debartolos are the good guys in this movie. And the 49ers will be visiting royalty, off to their first 3-0 start since the Ice Age.
Arizona can also reach 3-0 this weekend, by beating the visiting Philadelphians and Seattle can wake up the league by winning their home game against Green Bay. If both these teams win, the NFC West will not only reach respectability, it will draw some votes as the toughest division in the NFC. Should this occur, we might see an East Coast biasiter actually choke to death on national TV. I’ve got my own top five candidates to succumb by gasping. Perhaps our readers have theirs.
NFL Week Three is traditionally the week where the good teams begin asserting themselves and the bad teams start the long walk southward into oblivion. We saw a prime example Thursday night as the Giants completely mopped up the floor with the over-hyped Cam Newtons. Hype vs Reality will be on display in Denver this Sunday, also, when the concensus AFC most powerful Texans take on the Tebowless Broncos and their interception machine QB.
Three years ago, the Niners went to Minnesota with a chance to go 3-0 and got Farved by a game ending Hail Mary. Most of the current team was there that woeful day and you can bet they remember it. And are determined not to let it happen again.