The 2010 NFL season is now officially toast. The people in Green Bay and their fans in other cities and towns will try to keep it open for the next six months, but for the other 31 NFL franchises it is move on down the road time.
For 49er fans, the season can be summed up in three letters: P. O. S.
Fans of the Panthers, Cowboys, Vikings, Broncos, Bengals, and Cardinals might also find these letters applicable to their own seasons. Fans in Oakland, Detroit, Tampa Bay, Seattle, St. Louis, Cleveland, and Kansas City can view the season as a success, since all of these teams climbed out of Laughing Stock, USA this past year. Everyone else has various degrees of half full or half empty glasses to dwell upon in the dark taverns of their minds.
Astute readers may notice I did not mention Buffalo. It’s unclear if they are still in the league. It’s also unclear whether they improved, stayed the same, or got worse. What their fans think, other than terminal despair, is a mystery. Sorry, Bills. We’ll have to place you in the Other file. Maybe the Redskins should go in there, too. Who knows how that dysfunctional mess can be categorized?
Screw them all, though. It was a P.O.S. out here, and that’s all that matters.
Well, not totally ALL. I’m hyperbolificating. While it’s true the 49er 2010 season is solidly in the I Don’t Want To Talk About It category, being a 49er fan is necessarily also being an NFL football fan. As such, part of the enjoyment of any season is savoring the failure of other teams, players, and peripheral entities. Some people might view this as being negative and point out that we should enjoy other peoples’ success, too. Baloney. What fun is that? Those are matters for the church, not the gridiron.
In pigskin land, primal grunting and smirky snorting is A-okay. This interlude from a PC world is a big reason why the NFL game is the most popular enterprise on the face of the earth. There’s also blood and severe injuries, and lots of sexual indiscretions. The NFL has it all. It’s also the arena where one can actually witness JUSTICE being, well, justly rendered. You can’t buy off the football gods.
Where else can you see a smug, arrogant, useless bag of politician smelling turd like Jerry Jones take a pie in the face for his team, his stadium, and his handling of the Super Bowl fans? Get the old snirk, snirk, snirk treatment. Or a false humility grand stander like Mike Singletary get laughed out of town? Serial cheater Bill Belichick once again choked in the post season. Michael Vick and Ben Roethlisberger spent the year polishing their Reformed Citizen images, but the football gods were not fooled and sent them home losers in the playoffs. Brett Farve limped off the stage with more people talking about his male organ photo shoot than his QB arm. Ken Whisenhunt wasn’t much of a great coach without Kurt Warner. The traitorous Norv Turner continued his reign of ineptitude in San Diego. Mike Shanahan, Dan Snyder, and Albert Haynesworth conducted a season long ménage à trois of lunacy in Washington. The list of lurid failures and embarrassments of the 2010 season is endless. Perhaps our readers have their own favorites.
But it was still a P.O.S. season. Good riddance. Tomorrow, it is 2011 all the way.