Lower the Casket

The 2010 NFL season is now officially toast. The people in Green Bay and their fans in other cities and towns will try to keep it open for the next six months, but for the other 31 NFL franchises it is move on down the road time.

For 49er fans, the season can be summed up in three letters: P. O. S.

Fans of the Panthers, Cowboys, Vikings, Broncos, Bengals, and Cardinals might also find these letters applicable to their own seasons. Fans in Oakland, Detroit, Tampa Bay, Seattle, St. Louis, Cleveland, and Kansas City can view the season as a success, since all of these teams climbed out of Laughing Stock, USA this past year. Everyone else has various degrees of half full or half empty glasses to dwell upon in the dark taverns of their minds.

Astute readers may notice I did not mention Buffalo. It’s unclear if they are still in the league. It’s also unclear whether they improved, stayed the same, or got worse. What their fans think, other than terminal despair, is a mystery. Sorry, Bills. We’ll have to place you in the Other file. Maybe the Redskins should go in there, too. Who knows how that dysfunctional mess can be categorized?

Screw them all, though. It was a P.O.S. out here, and that’s all that matters.

Well, not totally ALL. I’m hyperbolificating. While it’s true the 49er 2010 season is solidly in the I Don’t Want To Talk About It category, being a 49er fan is necessarily also being an NFL football fan. As such, part of the enjoyment of any season is savoring the failure of other teams, players, and peripheral entities. Some people might view this as being negative and point out that we should enjoy other peoples’ success, too. Baloney. What fun is that? Those are matters for the church, not the gridiron.

In pigskin land, primal grunting and smirky snorting is A-okay. This interlude from a PC world is a big reason why the NFL game is the most popular enterprise on the face of the earth. There’s also blood and severe injuries, and lots of sexual indiscretions. The NFL has it all. It’s also the arena where one can actually witness JUSTICE being, well, justly rendered. You can’t buy off the football gods.

Where else can you see a smug, arrogant, useless bag of politician smelling turd like Jerry Jones take a pie in the face for his team, his stadium, and his handling of the Super Bowl fans? Get the old snirk, snirk, snirk treatment. Or a false humility grand stander like Mike Singletary get laughed out of town? Serial cheater Bill Belichick once again choked in the post season. Michael Vick and Ben Roethlisberger spent the year polishing their Reformed Citizen images, but the football gods were not fooled and sent them home losers in the playoffs. Brett Farve limped off the stage with more people talking about his male organ photo shoot than his QB arm. Ken Whisenhunt wasn’t much of a great coach without Kurt Warner. The traitorous Norv Turner continued his reign of ineptitude in San Diego. Mike Shanahan, Dan Snyder, and Albert Haynesworth conducted a season long ménage à trois of lunacy in Washington. The list of lurid failures and embarrassments of the 2010 season is endless. Perhaps our readers have their own favorites.

But it was still a P.O.S. season. Good riddance. Tomorrow, it is 2011 all the way.



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11 comments on “Lower the Casket
  1. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Let us just hope Jed is a philomath because he has a lot to learn about running a winning franchise.

  2. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    The Josh McDaniels epic failure in Denver was a treat for me. For a guy who came in with such glowing credentials from his time in NE, he pissed off and alienated everyone in the organization. Even with their boatload of picks last year (and Tim Tebow) they managed to crash and burn with the best of them.

    Spygate II. Orton. 4-12. Woo hoo!!

    Crazy thing is, McDaniels ended up a lot like Singletary. Pointing fingers, and completely lost. Granted, Josh has a better pedigree, but what a clusterf*ck job he did in Denver.

  3. RTFireflyNo Gravatar says:

    Maybe I’m too old, but I’ve always admired the Packers – a childhood thing. The Nineties made me intensely dislike them (Favre made it easy), but I never hated them like I do the Cowpatties, with stealing the Super Bowl away from John Brodie, Jimmy Johnson and Co. I tried to buy the Packers once. Well, 1 share of stock, but their publicly owned corporation has a residency requirement – I forget, WI residents or something. (I kid you not – I DID own the Boston Celtics. Well 1 share, until they converted into a limited partnership.) So, I just can’t hate the Pack. But #5 to tie the Niners? No flippin’ way!!

  4. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    There’s no doubt you are too old, RT, but it’s easy to admire the Packers as a franchise. I was a Browns fan as a kid, so I did not like Jim Taylor and his cronies much. I remember the Lions beating the heavily favored Pack on Thanksgiving in the early sixties and enjoying hell out of that crushing.
    .
    Lately, of course, the Pack has haunted the Niners for fifteen years or so and with Rogers at QB, the 2005 draft will never go away. We need to beat those guys. Harbaugh better put it near the top of his list.

  5. RTFireflyNo Gravatar says:

    I did hate Reggie White, though (RIP). God told him to help the inner-city youth of Green Bay?With him, the Niners certainly would have added a couple more Lombardi Trophies.

  6. Unca ChuckNo Gravatar says:

    RTF, that REALLY chapped my hide. The whole “God told me to take the money” deal with Reggie White. Fricking tool. I’m going to help inner-city youth in Green Bay? What a crock of shit that was. Milwaukee barely rates.

    I liked the Bears back in the day (my family is all from there, I’m the only one born in CA). The Pack? I liked ’em enough unless they were playing the Niners. Lombardi and all that. I guess I liked them because of NFL films (kudos to Ed Sabol, BTW). I hated the Packers later becasue of all those playoff losses in the 90s, but the level never reached Cowboys-hate. Or Ram-hate (back then). Having lived through Roman Gabriel kicking our ass over and over years got old real fast.

  7. bigtimNo Gravatar says:

    the highlight of the season was watching game 16 and not having to look at mr line backer coach stomping on the sidelines, and the players having fun stomping the cards.
    no more film watching excuses, I have some hope now that a real coaching staff may be coming to the team and there will be some actual results.
    this season is in the past now its time for some summer baseball,and with a hope the NFL can get a CBA together so the team can get some work done with there new coach, and his staff

  8. RTFireflyNo Gravatar says:

    Chuck, if I remember right, the Rams had a 19-1 run against the Niners going into 1981. The Niners changed that completely around, going on a 19-1 against the Rams. I never hated the Rams for some reason, probably because I had no more room for hate after the Cowpatties.

  9. RTFireflyNo Gravatar says:

    Oh and Chuck (apologies Skeebs -from Chuck’s blog), there is NO comparison between Nate Clements and Aso. Aso was 2nd team All-Pro this year, 1st team All-Pro last year. He has allowed 81 completed passes against him in his last 47 games spanning 3 seasons. Aso is going to the HOF. Nate and Canton will never be mentioned in the same sentence. I hope the Niners fork out for him, if the $ doesn’t tick off the locker room.

  10. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    I would concur RT – Nnamdi is a class act with some serious upside and a local address.

    Move Nate to FS, lower his Contract amount and pay a few more guys who are also deserving.

    As for the Cowpatties? Hate J.O. with a passion, biggest Blowhard in Sports, Bar None.

    Best thing he ever did for us was to fire Jimmy Johnson. A curse for him, a huge blessing for us.

  11. NJ49erNo Gravatar says:

    Donatell may be the surprise hire of the entire Staff this time around?

    Gonna be interesting.

2018 Schedule
9-9, L: Vikings 24, 49ers 16
9-16, W: 49ers 30, Lions 27

9-23: @ Chiefs, 10:00 am, Sun.
9-30: @ Chargers, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-7: vs. Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-15: @ Packers, 5:15 pm, Mon.
10-21: vs. Rams, 5:20 pm, Sun.
10-28: @ Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
11-1: vs. Raiders, 5:20 pm, Thur.
11-12: vs. Giants, 5:15 pm, Mon.
BYE
11-25: @ Tampa, 10:00 am, Sun.
12-2: @ Seattle, 5:20 pm, Sun.
12-9: vs. Broncos, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-16: vs. Seattle, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-23: vs. Bears, 1:05 pm, Sun.
12-30: @ Rams, 1:25 pm, Sun.
 
2018 Draft Class
1. OT Mike McGlinchey
2. WR Dante Pettis
3. LB Fred Warner
3. DB Tarvarius Moore
4. DE Kentavius Street
5. CB D.J. Reed
6. S Marcell Harris
7. DT Jullian Taylor
7. WR Richie James
 
2018 Prognostications
Bakkentom: 8-8
Bullit: 9-7
Grumpy: 8-8
Mr Fletch: 7-9
NJ49er: 9-7
Skeebers: 10-6
Winder: 8-8

Spitblood: 0-16
Rob!!!: 16-0

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