Cardinals Improve Draft Status

The Arizona Cardinals resoundingly laid claim to being the worse team in the NFL Monday night, letting the inept San Francisco 49ers grind them into the sand for four straight quarters of toad ugly football. Well, ugly for us Card fans, that is. SF probably liked it, but who cares about them? For us, it’s back to being Bill Bidwill’s team and not Kurt Warner’s team. You all know what that means. The fifteen minutes of fame in cactus country has ended.

Next Sunday, the Rams come to Arizona, looking for a win that could put them in the driver’s seat for the NFC West Tricycle Division championship. St. Louis would not have expected to win this game when the season began, but now it looks like a cakewalk. The Rams have a better running game than the 49ers and a better QB. It will be ugly.

The 49ers will fly home feeling good about themselves, but we all know that feeling will be blown apart next Sunday in Green Bay, where the Niners are very likely to get a ass whipping as severe as the one they delivered last night. For 49er fans, the surety of defeat next Sunday gives them almost a bye week before their fateful home game against the Seahawks the following Sunday.

Arizona showed America what a team looks like when it quits on a season. Despite a powder puff remaining schedule, where the team could conceivably have run off six straight wins and won the division at 9-7, the team had no interest in even trying. Say what you will about the 49ers talent and coaching, but that team never quits. They probably should quit, and their fans certainly have, but the team itself just keeps on plugging.

Not our own effete corps of impudent snob Cardinals, though. These posers viewed a Monday night game with a national audience as a chance to show tourists the feeling they would get if they came to visit the Grand Canyon. Breath taking views of the 49er QB standing alone, looking downfield without a single Cardinal defensive lineman or linebacker anywhere visible in front of him on the screen. Did the team go to the sideline for a snack break? Gaping caverns opening up to the right of prized NT draft pick Dan Williams that you could send a couple of white water rafts through. Frank Gore, SF’s prized workhorse running back, broke his hip in the first quarter, but it didn’t matter. The 49ers could have put a helmet on Peewee Herman and gained yardage.

As pitiful as the Cardinals were last night, they at least know they are losers. Not so the fantasy land 49ers. That team still thinks it can go to the playoffs. Har har hearty har har. What a preposterous delusion. Give it up, Red and Gold fakers, you stink too. Don’t kid yourselves. You frauds are heading for the fish tank just as surely as blackouts are looming for Arizona. Go ahead, you worthless fleebs, dream on for another week or two. I can’t wait to see you crushed and beaten like our home town boys. It’s coming. Just you wait. Doom is just another game away. Hahaha.



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Posted in Monday Morning Quarterback
12 comments on “Cardinals Improve Draft Status
  1. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    A little confusing. Was this your sardonic version of putting yourself in the mind of a Cards fan? Your assessment of us as a Cardinals fan was the same I have of us as a 49er fan. I’m guessing that was your point, right? Even with this win, we are still lilliputian.
     
    BTW, sardonic is not to be confused with the Sardine Can Offense we ran last night. Even though, the SCO allows for one to be very sardonic, there is no relationship between the two, except that when using one it usually brings out the other. It did work last night, but upon review we notice our record is still 4-7 and we did lose to Carolina.

  2. SkeebersNo Gravatar says:

    I didn’t want to piss off Dennis by, you know, discussing a 49er victory. Or mentioning the unmentionable implications. He was insistent on enjoying his breakfast without any disturbing cheery Niner news. I thought maybe a dreary Cardinal view might cheer him up. Not that he can be, but he could be less cheered up. Maybe he can just eat and think he logged into the wrong blog.

  3. Mr FletchNo Gravatar says:

    I loved watching Norris getting blown up on his blocks. On the Dixon TD, Norris was pushed backwards by the guy he was supposed to block. On other plays, the entirety of his blocking was throwing his body at the feet of a tackler. Fortunately, Westbrook was more elusive than Gore typically is. (Yes, Berger has said it all before, but I really was noticing it during last night’s game.)

    It was fun to watch the Niners win so decisively, but the problem will be when Good Ol’ “Watch the Tape” Sing looks at this game and decides that it represented a vindication of his every football desire.

    At least next week in GB we can have a change of pace. “Westbrook into the middle of the line for no gain.”

  4. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Don’t worry about Dennis, he’s too busy fighting off the Mayans. The SF Giants might have already saved him from them, but he’s still fighting, or at least fighting mad!

  5. delmardennisNo Gravatar says:

    My coffee and apple danish never tasted better. Skeebers reassurance that the 49ers still stink on ice, albeit less than the truly dreadful Cardinals, has given me reason to soldier on in this equally truly dreadful 49er season. Thanks for setting the record straight. I feel much better now.

  6. delmardennisNo Gravatar says:

    Berger used the word “lilliputian” today. Looks like I’m not the only one who receives the dictionary.com WOTD.
     
    Lilliputian reminds me of Hanna-Barbera’s “The Adventures of Gulliver” series from 1968. My favorite Lilliputian of course was, Glumm. I think his catchphrase pretty much sums up my thoughts regarding our 49ers. “We’re doomed…we’ll never make it.”

  7. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Dennis- I was trying to decide whether to use sarcastic or sardonic. I went to dictionary.com and there it was, lilliputian. What a perfect word for this season. I immediately thought two things. One, we should use the word of the day everyday in our posts, and two, how long until somebody comments that I used the word of the day?

  8. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Furthermore, after seeing lilliputian, I forgot to look up sardonic and sarcastic!

  9. delmardennisNo Gravatar says:

    I think you were correct in using sardonic for our Niners. Sarcasm is better served for teams who still have hope.

  10. robNo Gravatar says:

    troy smith is still our best chance at winning when it come to QB’s on the roster !

    jacoby ford was even better than i thought he’d be

    brian westbrook was a good pick-up , and hopefully we’ll use a one two punch of dixon and westbrook … and less ‘smashmouth’

    i wonder if someone on here has any ‘BROBDINGNAGian’ opinions on the current state of our team , and the cause of our current struggles ! could it be the QB , or the coaching ???

    😀

  11. delmardennisNo Gravatar says:

    You keep hoping for that NoFear and I’ll keep hoping for Santa Claus to bring Scarlett Johansson down my chimney on Christmas morning. I got a better chance waking up to Scarlett wearing nothing but a big red ribbon than our coaches/coordinators do of getting innovative and begin scheming for opponents.

  12. BergerNo Gravatar says:

    Rob- We won last night despite Troy Smith. He was terible.

2019 Schedule
9-8: W 49ers 31, Buccaneers 17
9-15: W 49ers 41,Bengals 17
9-22: vs. Pittsburgh Steelers, 1:25pm
9-29: BYE

10-7: vs. Cleveland Browns, 5:15pm
10-13: @ Los Angeles Rams, 1:05pm
10-20: @ Washington, 10am
10-27: vs. Carolina Panthers, 1:05pm
10-31: @ Arizona Cardinals, 5:20pm

11-11: vs. Seattle Seahawks, 5:15pm
11-17: vs. Arizona Cardinals, 1:05pm
11-24: vs. Green Bay Packers, 1:25pm

12-1: @ Baltimore Ravens, 10am
12-8: @ New Orleans Saints, 10am
12-15: vs. Atlanta Falcons, 1:25pm
12-21 or 12-22: vs. Los Angeles Rams
12-29: @ Seattle Seahawks, 1:25pm

2019 Draft Class
1. DE Nick Bosa, Ohio State
2. WR Deebo Samuel, South Carolina
3. WR Jalen Hurd, Baylor
4. P Mitch Wishnowsky, Utah
5. LB Dre Greenlaw, Arkansas
6. TE Kaden Smith, Stanford
6. OT Justin Skule, Vanderbilt
6. DB Tim Harris, Virginia
 
2019 Prognostications
Bakkentom: 10-6
Bullit: 10-6
Grumpy: 9-7
Mr Fletch: 7-9
NJ49er: 7-9
Skeebers: 8-8
Winder: 7-9

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