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Cowboys 24, 49ers 17

For one shining quarter, the Chip Kelly offense lived up to its hype. The 49ers roared out to a 14-0 lead, scoring their second TD one minute into the second quarter. From there on out, it was Cowboys 24 and

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Seahawks 37, 49ers 18

The Seahawks hadn’t scored a touchdown in their first two games of the season, but it only took three plays and 43 seconds to remedy that ailment against the inept 49ers Sunday in Seattle. They added three more, tossed in

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Panthers 46, 49ers 27

The 49ers dusted off the old rope-a-dope strategy Sunday versus Carolina by lulling the Panthers to sleep with an endless stream of three and out punts, counting on the Panthers to get careless with the ball. It worked! They got

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49ers 28, Rams 0

Well, that was surprising. Not the victory so much as the magnitude of it. Chip Kelly and Blaine Gabbert, two NFL entities pretty much consigned to the scrap heap by league “experts” and “insiders,” stuck the old thumb in the

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Packers 21, 49ers 10

After sitting out the offseason, and Training Camp, and the preseason, and the National Anthem, Colin Kaepernick finally returned to action Friday night and made a strong case for sitting out the regular season, too. And that’s your 49er highlight

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49ers 31, Broncos 24

The San Francisco 49ers outscored the Denver Broncos 31-24 Saturday night, producing their second straight game with 400+ yards of offense. The three 49er QBs rebounded from a less than stellar effort in the first preseason game and finished the

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Texans 24, 49ers 13

The San Francisco 49ers trampled the Houston Texans in the first half of Sunday night’s exhibition game in Santa Clara, but two costly fumbles — one on the Houston two yard line that prevented a score and one Houston returned

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Broncos 24, Panthers 10

So that’s it. Another NFL season hits the pavement in search of its place in history. Super Bowl 50 looks like a perfect candidate for the “Just Win, Baby” division. In the “Defense Wins Championships” category. One of my favorite

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49ers 19, Rams 16

Two delsultory teams closed out their desultory seasons yesterday with a desultory overtime mess that the 49ers won via FG after the Rams had botched their own effort to win via FG. Of the 49ers five wins this season, two

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Lions 32, 49ers 17

The 49ers set an NFL record Sunday in Detroit: most offside penalties in one half. Six. And that’s your 49er highlights for the game! They also nailed themselves to the basement floor in the NFC West. Next week, the team

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Bengals 24, 49ers 14

For most of the first half, the 49ers and Bengals held a punting contest. Very scintillating viewing. Then quite suddenly, with five minutes left until halftime, the Bengals put up 21 points. One TD came after an Anquan Boldin fumble

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Browns 24, 49ers 10

The Blaine Gabbert Era turned a jubilant corner last week against the Bears, only to run smack into a brick wall this week in Cleveland. The two win Browns completely dominated the game, out gaining the 49ers 481-221 yards, with

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49ers 26, Bears 20

In the “blind squirrel finds nut” department, the 49ers won their first road game of the year Sunday in Chicago by being slightly less inept than the Bears. The game featured 15 punts — six by the Bears and nine

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Cardinals 19, 49ers 13

The 49ers lost to the Cardinals Sunday in Santa Clara, imploding their record to 3-8 and 0-5 in the NFC West. But, this is the new Niners and we’ve had to trade in our old adjectives, like mighty and powerful,

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Seahawks 29, 49ers 13

The 49ers kept their road record perfect on Sunday in Seattle, losing 29-13 for their fifth consecutive road loss. Once again, it was the defense that led the way to defeat as Seahawks backup RB Thomas Rawls bulled through them

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49ers 17, Falcons 16

A funny thing happened on the 49ers journey toward the number one pick in the 2016 draft. They screwed up and won a game against the fading Atlanta Falcons. Little did they know that their much maligned backup QB Blaine

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Rams 27, 49ers 6

The 49ers ran their perfect non-winning road streak to 4 games Sunday by flying to St. Louis and straight into the Rams windshield, where they were scraped off 27-6. In losing their sixth game in eight tries, the 49ers put

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Seahawks 20, 49ers 3

The San Francisco 49ers’ two game flirtation as a bona fide NFL entity came to a screeching halt Thursday night as the Seattle Seahawks pounded them into oblivion, ravaged their village, stole their manhood, ran off with their wives, and

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49ers 25, Ravens 20

In a battle of bleeding franchises, the 49ers leaked less than the Ravens Sunday, stopping their four game losing streak and notching their second win of the 2015 season. With the loss, the Ravens put themselves in contention for a

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Giants 30, 49ers 27

Close, but no seegar. For the second straight week, the 49ers wracked up a moral victory. And also lost their fourth game in a row. Last week, the defense was respectable and the offense stunk. This week the offense actually

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Packers 17, 49ers 3

The 49ers were beaten thoroughly by the Packers Sunday, 17-3, in what passes this season as a “nail biter.” Green Bay took a seven point lead in the first quarter, and even though the Niners were always within reach according

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Cardinals 47, 49ers 7

As Denny Green would say, more or less: “They are who we thought they were!” For the second straight week, the 49ers endured a complete butt whipping. Last week Pittsburgh did the honors 43-18, and this week Arizona outdid that

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2017 Schedule
Sept. 10: vs Carolina: L 3-23
Sept. 17: at Seattle: 9-12
Sept. 21: vs. L.A. Rams: L 39-41
Oct. 1: at Arizona: L 15-18
Oct. 8: at Indianapolis: L 23-26
Oct. 15: at Washington: L 24-26
Oct. 22: vs. Dallas, 1:05 p.m.
Oct. 29: at Philadelphia, 10 a.m.
Nov. 5: vs. Arizona, 1:05 p.m.
Nov. 12: vs. N.Y. Giants, 1:25 p.m.
Week 11 — Bye
Nov. 26: vs. Seattle, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 3: at Chicago, 10 a.m.
Dec. 10: at Houston, 10 a.m.
Dec. 17: vs. Tennessee, 1:25 p.m.
Dec. 24: vs. Jacksonville, 1:05 p.m.
Dec. 31: at L.A. Rams, 1:25 p.m.
 
2017 Draft Class
1. DE Solomon Thomas
1. ILB Reuben Foster
3. CB Ahkello Witherspoon
3. QB C.J. Beathard
4. RB Joe Williams
5. TE George Kittle
5. WR Trent Taylor
6. DT D.J. Jones
6. LB Pita Taumoepenu
7. CB Adrian Colbert
 
2017 Prognostications
Bullit: 5-11
Chuck: 9-7
Grumpy: 4-12
Mr Fletch: 5-11
NJ49er: 6-10
Rob: 9-7
RTFirefly: 5-11
Skeebers: 6-10
Winder: 4-12

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