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49ers 33, Patriots 6

49ers 2, Gauntlet 0. Wins are always enjoyable, but demolishing the Patriots in their own park is about as sweet as it gets. This was a thorough butt-kicker special, from beginning to end. Can’t say I saw this one coming.

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49ers 24, Rams 16

The grave diggers had to holster their shovels Sunday night in Santa Clara, as the 49ers limped out of the morgue to live another week. Looking a lot like last year’s team, the defense shut down the high powered Rams

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Dolphins 43, 49ers 17

So, about next year … The only thing that could save this year is if COVID went crazy and they had to scrap the season. The Niners got trashed so bad it looked like the 2016 team out there on

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Eagles 25, 49ers 20

The 49ers lost to  the Eagles 25-20 Sunday night, but a more accurate portrayal of the score would be 49ers 20, Eagles 8, Nick Mullens -17. And just like that, the bandwagons of the 49ers and of Mullens emptied out into

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49ers 36, Giants 9

The stock price of Nick Mullens, Inc surged upward Sunday in New Jersey as he directed a thorough and relentless butt-kicking of the hapless New York Giants. Mullens completed 25 of 36 to ten different receivers while racking up 343  yards.

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49ers 31, Jets 13

The 49ers got back on track by drubbing the hapless Jets Sunday, but they likely lost any chance at being a SB contender this year when all-world DE Nick Bosa tore his ACL and will be out for the season. The

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Cardinals 24, 49ers 20

The 49ers tried to play a 21st century football game with no wide receivers. Fail. Kendrick Bourne: 2 receptions. Dante Pettis: zero. AZ secondary: smoke break. DC Robert Saleh had an entire offseason to figure out how to defend against squirt-ball QBs. Fail. Kyler

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Chiefs 31, 49ers 20

The 49ers’ fairy tale season came to an ignominious end Sunday night in Miami, crushed to death at the fifty yard line as Jimmy Garoppolo stood motionless, unable or unwilling to throw the ball on fourth and ten with the season

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49ers 37, Packers 20

The 49ers made it look easy Sunday night, pounding their way to a 27-0 halftime lead and cruising to the finish line. There wasn’t a moment of real anxiety the entire game. The most laughable and yet telling stat of

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49ers 27, Vikings 10

When last we saw the 49ers, they were surviving by an inch after a second half defensive collapse that nearly derailed their season. They had also just finished five  consecutive nail-biter games, going 3-2. Saturday, however, they mercifully quit pissing around

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49ers 26, Seahawks 21

Sorry for the tardy game wrap up, guys. I was out of town for the weekend and didn’t get back until late Monday. The delay did give me a chance to spend quite a bit of time gloating shamelessly. I

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49ers 34, Rams 31

The 49ers showed a championship  heart in their victory over the Rams on Saturday night, but not a championship talent level. They were outplayed for most of the game, and it took a brilliant defensive play by Fred Warner to steal

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Falcons 29, 49ers 22

The 49ers backed into the playoffs Sunday, when the Rams got clobbered by Dallas. That they lost to the Falcons was disappointing, but in the end makes little difference in the standings. They still need to win the next two

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49ers 48, Saints 46

Mark Bavaro, Marshawn Lynch, Roger Craig.  George Kittle bulled his way into NFL Beast Mode lore Sunday afternoon in New Orleans with a monster 39 yard catch and rumble with 39 seconds left in the game to pull the 49er butts out

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Ravens 20, 49ers 17

A great game between two great teams. The Ravens had the ball last and made one more play than the Niners, kicking the game winning field goal as time expired. The 49er defense showed why they’re the best in the

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49ers 37, Packers 8

Goodness. That was an unexpected butt kicking. I guess all those pundits who questioned the 49er defense because it hadn’t faced elite QBs are going to need  something new to find wrong with them. The first leg of the unholy

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49ers 36, Cardinals 26

The 49ers squeezed out a win Sunday afternoon against the Cardinals, and guaranteed their first winning season since 2013. Early in the game, however, it looked more like they would be the first team in NFL history to win its

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Seahawks 27, 49ers 24

Off the top: Shit. The 49ers, perhaps rashly, tried to beat Seattle with their B team Monday night, but came up a tad short when the B team kicker missed the game winner in OT. Playing without their top two

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49ers 28, Cardinals 25

Effing Arizona. It doesn’t matter if the 49ers are good and the Cardinals are bad, or vice versa, or both one or both the other, it’s always been tough to win down there. Some real heartbreakers over the years. The

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49ers 51, Panthers 13

Well, hell, I’m impressed. The league probably is, too. And if not, then at least Carolina should be. Whew, what a butt kicking. This was a good Panthers team, but the 49ers just trampled them from start to finish. On

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49ers 9, Washington 0

As noted by our astute commenters, sometimes ugly can be beautiful, and this game truly was. Probably the most gorgeous ugly victory of the year. Washington conjured up a squall for this game, which tilted the odds their way since

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49ers 20, Rams 7

It appears to be official: the 49ers are BACK. The only undefeated team in the NFC and atop the standings in the NFC West. For the second week in a row, they dominated the TOP, this time by 39 to

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2020 Schedule
9-13: L Cardinals 24, 49ers 20
9-20: W 49ers 31, Jets 13
9-27: W 49ers 36, Giants 9

10-4: L Eagles 25, 49ers 20
10-11: L Dolphins 43, 49ers 17
10-18: W 49ers 24, Rams 16
10-25: W 49ers 33, Patriots 6

11-1: @ SEA
11-5: GB (TNF)
11-15: @ NO

BYE

11-29: @LAR

12-7: BUF (MNF)
12-13: WAS
12-20: @ DAL (SNF)
12-26: or 27 @ AZ

1-3: SEA

2020 Draft Class
1. DT Javon Kinlaw, South Carolina
1. WR Brandon Aiyuk, Arizona State
5. OL Colton McKivitz, West Virginia
6. TE Charlie Woerner, Georgia
7. WR Jauan Jennings, Tennessee
 
2020 Prognostications
Bullit: 12-4
Grumpy: 12-4
NJ49er: 11-5
Skeebers: 11-5
Winder: 11-5

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