Blog Archives

Kansas City Star, That’s What He Are

At the beginning of the season, nearly everyone figured the 49ers’ record after two games would be 1-1. There were a couple of guys who felt differently, but they have now clunked to the bottom of the “Prognostications” list, where

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Here, Kitty, Kitty

The 49ers catch a break this week, as the awful Detroit Lions come to town, fresh off a week one 48-17 thrashing by the New York Jets. A rather inauspicious debut for Lions’ HC Matt Patricia, who begins his post-Belichick

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Opening Bell

It’s one week until the gates open on the 2018 NFL season. Which means it’s time to throw our brains on the table and cough up our annual predictions of what the 49ers’ record will be this year. As usual,

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It’s a Mad World

So, in with Jimmy Garappolo, out with Kirk Cousins. And, for his 0-6 efforts, Brian Hoyer goes from worst to first. Reminds me of David Baas, the O-line guy who did squat here for five years, then went to the

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First vs Worst

The 49ers travel to Philadelphia this weekend for what will probably be a systematic and thorough disembowelment. The Eagles have the best record in the NFC and unless they fall apart down the stretch in a typical Philly meltdown, they

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Back to You, Ed

NFL season: Take Two. Let’s try this again. Where were we? 0-3 and dead last in the NFC West. Next up, at Arizona. This would normally be an automatic 0-4, but the Cardinals seem to have fallen apart about as

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Potential vs Reality

Okay. Enough of the foreplay. Next Sunday the Kyle Shanahan Era officially begins. Good luck, KS. You’ve got big shoes to fill (the Jim Harbaugh Era), and tiny shoes to flick aside (the Jim Tomsula/Chip Kelly Eras). And, of course,

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Last Slice of Humble Pie

Another season has slipped away, taking with it the 49ers pride, dignity, heritage, pants, shoes, jockstraps, NFL relevance — you name it, they lost it. The team closes out their season Sunday, at home against the Seahawks, who have beaten

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When Bums Collide

The 49ers have lost 13 straight. The Rams have lost 5 in a row. Yes, the folks in Los Angeles will be streaming into the stadium this Saturday. After all, everybody likes a good train wreck and this game involves

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Another Trip to the Woodshed

Last Sunday, Atlanta laid such a relentless whipping on the Rams that it sent LA’s HC Jeff Fisher out the door and into the unemployment line. Next Sunday, the Falcons will quite likely administer the same sort of beat down

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Olfactory Assault

After making debacle all down they legs and all over they feets in Chicago, the 49ers stank their way back to Santa Clara and began preparing for the equally stanky New York Jets this coming Sunday. These two franchises have

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Wasn’t It a Long Way Down

Congratulations to the 2016 49ers. In the 68th year of the franchise, you guys have accomplished the awesomely difficult task of losing ten straight games, the most in team history. No mean feat. To think, only four years ago, this

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Aiming For Infamy

Some good games on tap for Thanksgiving this year. Minnesota vs Detroit for NFC North supremacy, Dallas vs Washington for the NFC East, and Pittsburgh vs Indianapolis for two teams trying to stay alive in crappy divisions. The 49ers won’t

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Nothing But Nyet

The evil New England Patriots come to town this Sunday, looking to beat up on the local boys. Chances are better than good they’ll do exactly that. The defense finally stopped getting traumatized by opposing teams’ rushing attacks last Sunday.

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Journey to the Center of Nowhere

The San Francisco 49ers set the franchise’s 21st Century gold standard of stinkitude in 2004, finishing the season with a 2-14 record. That was the last year of Troy Donahue‘s inept GM indifference and John York‘s visibility as the face

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Keep the Streak Alive

The New Orleans Saints come calling this Sunday, no doubt looking eagerly forward to trashing the 49ers’ woeful defense. The Saints’ defense is no top drawer outfit, either, but if the game is a shootout, who you gonna call: Drew

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Worst a Shires Tilt

Here it is! All you washed up QB and/or Trent Baalke fans, this is the game for you! Finally, a game the 49ers might actually win. The Tampa Bay Bucs travel cross country, dragging their 2-3 record with them. 3,000

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Return of the Jerk

The 49ers are five games into the 2016 season and already the year is a lost cause. So, why not re-insert a lost cause at QB? At this point that is just cosmetic whimsy. It’s GM Trent Baalke‘s hand picked

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And the Least Shall Be Last

The 49ers and Cardinals meet tonight in a battle for the basement in the NFC West. That the Niners are engaged in this sort of tawdry affair is no surprise, but Arizona has been a surprise disappointment thus far in

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Lame Owners’ Bowl

The Jeckyll and Hyde 49ers return home this weekend to play the Cowboys, hoping the Doctor is in and not the other guy. The howls have already begun to yank Blaine Gabbert and try one of the other bust QBs

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Dink and Dunker Special

The 49ers haven’t won a game in Seattle since the 2011 season. They swept the Seahawks that year, split with them the next two years, and were skunked in 2014 and 2015. Still, our boys have a golden opportunity to

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Carolina In My Mind

The 49ers travel to North Carolina this weekend to throw themselves under the Panthers’ playoff bus on Sunday. At least, that’s the general view around the league and in Las Vegas. Apparently, the blow out win over the Rams did

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2018 Schedule
9-9, L: Vikings 24, 49ers 16
9-16, W: 49ers 30, Lions 27

9-23: @ Chiefs, 10:00 am, Sun.
9-30: @ Chargers, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-7: vs. Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
10-15: @ Packers, 5:15 pm, Mon.
10-21: vs. Rams, 5:20 pm, Sun.
10-28: @ Cardinals, 1:25 pm, Sun.
11-1: vs. Raiders, 5:20 pm, Thur.
11-12: vs. Giants, 5:15 pm, Mon.
BYE
11-25: @ Tampa, 10:00 am, Sun.
12-2: @ Seattle, 5:20 pm, Sun.
12-9: vs. Broncos, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-16: vs. Seattle, 1:25 pm, Sun.
12-23: vs. Bears, 1:05 pm, Sun.
12-30: @ Rams, 1:25 pm, Sun.
 
2018 Draft Class
1. OT Mike McGlinchey
2. WR Dante Pettis
3. LB Fred Warner
3. DB Tarvarius Moore
4. DE Kentavius Street
5. CB D.J. Reed
6. S Marcell Harris
7. DT Jullian Taylor
7. WR Richie James
 
2018 Prognostications
Bakkentom: 8-8
Bullit: 9-7
Grumpy: 8-8
Mr Fletch: 7-9
NJ49er: 9-7
Skeebers: 10-6
Winder: 8-8

Spitblood: 0-16
Rob!!!: 16-0

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