The NFL begins its summer season run on Court TV this Wednesday in Minnesota. In keeping with the non-ness of things, the courtroom proceedings will not actually be on TV.
The Outsider has not yet received the names of the professional liars who will be representing the players and owners in this greed squabblefest, but we promise to speak illfully of them whenever their repugnant identities are ultimately revealed. The loathing will be impartially meted out, rest assured.
The presiding judge in these sordid proceedings has had a full month to conjure up a way to slice the baby in half and piss off both sides of the litigation process, while simultaneously dodging any responsibility for what happens next. We’ll see how adept she is in this shell game.
It ain’t football, but it is a game. May as well find out which players are worth rooting against with the mostest honkamundity. Pictures of the various duplicitous scoundrels would be helpful in jumping to uncharitable conclusions regarding these chumps, so we’ll see if we can’t dig up some corporate mug shots in the coming days. Perhaps NoFear can lend a hand in this photo hunt, like he did last year during the 2010 season. Not sure if he’s fully unhibernated yet, but might as well leave this note on his igloo doorstep. Anybody else wanting to waste valuable moments of their lives by digging up dirt on these guys, feel free to pass along the poop.
Sorry for the short, meaningless pile of drivel today. I’m depressed. I need to run over a lawyer. Get pumped. Fight back. Powerlessness sucks.